Wednesday, 28 January 2015
adding your life to the future
I dont know about you folk out there but...I feel that documenting your life in diaries/photographs/film is so important. something to offer your future family members. in fact I'd say you owe it to them and the affordability of modern technology means theres no excuse not to.
Ever since I was given my first Brownie stills camera as a child by my loving parents I have been fascinated by being able to capture a moment of life forever in that little black plastic box. all you had to do was ensure the thing had a roll of film inside and a small click of your finger captured a moment of life in glorious technicolor..isnt that magic!? plus the image you have plucked from that thing called 'Time' which is forever moving forward doesnt ever age or decay. its really magical.
To fast forward a little that magic is extended by moving pictures/film and for the past 30 years of my life I have tirelessly endeavored to grab as much 'Time' as possible into my little magic black box. that has included family milestones like birthdays..holidays..Christmas times etc plus those little classic moments of life things which were unplanned and always turn out to be the best clips of film. I have such things as sitting around the table for a family meal. my children growing from a baby..the first walk...feeding time with messy face ha...first day at school with tears..the first little boy/girlfriend holding hands so innocently etc how you not capture such experiences forever?
all this leads onto a worrying problem if you value such family treasures that will not only be enjoyed into ones old age when memory fades but also be enjoyed by other family members in the future when you are dead and buried, the problem if fast changing technologies today and future proof archiving of these family treasures...so very important. todays technology relies on the slim shiny plastic digital disc called dvd or blue ray disc.
Remember when this disc first emerged it was promised to last a life time? that you could scratch it..spill tea over it...throw it around etc and still it would play. well it turned out to be exaggerated and mostly until. how long is a lifetime anyway? some marketing men proudly stated they would last at least 50 yrs. a few years later this was reduced to at least 20 yrs. since then these claims have been discredited...so whats the truth? can we trust our most valuable memories to these slices of shiny plastic?
Many experts now say no you cant. that the digital technology isnt a future proof stable base for long term storage of data. that there are inherent flaws in the burning/recording process. that time ravages slowly deteriorate the inks/dyes used on dvd discs, that temperatures also effect storage etc so in reality we were conned in the beginning by Corporate marketing men..no surprise there then.
my family memories are important to me so...I do my best to secure them by....ensuring my recorded discs are stored away from sunlight and every day house dust. that the temperatures even. I have recorded dvds now that are 10 yrs old and recently I have started to play them back. what I have found is that one in every 10 discs after 10 years is starting to fail. this means bits of film have dropped out..or broken up. some freeze the picture..others are rejected half way through playing etc so those of you who do the same as me beware.
I am currently copying all my stored discs onto new blank ones via my dvd/blueray player/recorder. easy to achieve as my recorder has a built in hard drive so you just transfer film from old discs up onto the hard drive and re-burn onto new discs. my theory being the newly copied discs should last another 10 yrs. on top of that I am making two copies of everything on different brand discs just in case one type fails down the road. also I am burning two types of blue ray discs again different brands and at different quality settings and burn speed. so in essence I shall end up with 4 copies of each film. bit over the top one may say? but arent these memories important?
I am thinking of also archiving my films onto an external hard drive which are reasonably cheap these days on places like Amazon. one issue with external hard drives for archiving long term is to remember that the internal mechanisms inside that drive the hard discs will fail over time if not used so...dont just throw it in the cupboard and forget about it for years no..it needs to be run every few months to keep the cogs oiled up. hard disc drives should not fail like dvds as they are designed to hold material longer. but that doesnt mean they definitely cant fail they can...just less chance of it happening.
what about flash drives and memory cards for long term archiving? I have little experience of these. longest I've had film stored on a memory card is 3 years now and it plays very well. can anyone suggest any other ways of secure archiving? I think we owe it to our childrens children and beyond when we are long dead to show them our family moments on film dont you??
CALLEN.....
Wednesday, 7 May 2014
I am angry......
I am angry! that doesnt mean I could turn violent at the flip of a coin NO.....although I've been known too in the past. I'm no sludge when it comes to defending my territory. its just when I feel anger I'm not a nice person to be around...nor am I in this negative state of mind very often. although anger is a natural emotion it normally has to be triggered by some form of other negative human behavior toward oneself. that happened to me last weekend. Let me explain......I was out socially enjoying a live band. had a lovely forefilling evening too. end of the night I made my way back to where I had parked my car just after the stroke of Mid-Night. it was a town out of my area I had visited and I took the trouble to park in an area away from the mainstream town centre mayhem. what I didnt take into account was there was a small night club just across the road partially out of sight. anyhow.....as I stroll merrily in the scented cool spring night air with the sound of the band still ringing in my ears I became aware about 200 yards ahead of me a commotion of sorts in the semi darkness. straining my eyes I couldnt quite make out what the noise was ahead only a blurred image of a group of people. as I neared it dawned on me it was where I had parked my car. about 100 yards closer I could see it was a scuffle of sorts and frenzied shouts/screams from female voices. whatever it was it was in full swing...even closer my worst fears were confirmed a group of young men were busy fighting in a drunken stupor right in front of my parked car. its one of those dreaded moments where your brain goes into over drive trying to work out the best thing to do? the fighting cocks started to fall against the front of my car...onto the bonnet..wild punching and screaming....I could hear flesh against metal and that dull thud. surely one has an automatic reaction to such a scene in front of you? do I quickly call the police? rush in to try and break it up or drag them away from my car...shout at them etc etc I continued to approach cautiously and raising my voice to get away from the car to no effect. I shout a second time louder. hardly any reaction at all. luckily two women got involved screaming to get away from the mans car. it worked. tensions lowered for a few minutes as they disentangled limbs from one another. red faced and semi staggering they began to move off across the road. relieved I took to inspecting my car in the semi darkness..wish I had a torch at this moment. the group had semi dispersed across the road and some had entered the night club. hardly any words were exchanged between us in the heat of the incident. I resigned myself to driving home. next day in the cold light of sunshine I surveyed the aftermath of a drunken brawl I wished no part of. two small dents in my car bonnet..two nasty scratches on my otherwise immaculate metallic paintwork wing. umpteen marks/scratches/pitted holes on the front plastic bumper console. what did I do to deserve that I said to myself!? not a happy bunny!
Tuesday, 18 March 2014
breakfast beany.......
I'm feeling poor this morning. its a self imposed feeling really. I mean I do occasionally get very lazy when it comes to food shopping and I allow my food cupboard to run almost bare...even the fridge is almost empty ie only a few eggs and milk in it along with the usual sauces and associated stuff, I'm sitting here eating baked beans for breakfast...really. it sounds kinda crazy I know but I sometimes allow this scenario to happen..its almost as if I'm testing myself in some way. something along the lines that denial is spiritually cleansing and you feel good about yourself for going through with it for a period. god believing religious folk might understand the process?..others of course will think its crazy. in reality I actually like shopping too...yes even food shopping. many women assume men dont and dont have the patience. but the whole social side to shopping I enjoy like meeting new faces..having a chat...gazing at goods and feeling them...even smelling the newness. I enjoy the set up of shops and sometimes fab displays...different uniforms of brands worn by staff. even discovering or buying different stuff to what I do normally. I enjoy it all..the whole experience. I like shopping with a woman too as it just adds to the fun. women approach shopping so differently to men I find. anyway....my cupboards are not bare because I dislike shopping..or that I'm broke. nor do I have a passion for eating baked beans either in fact I dont like them much..but its all I have. The taste of baked beans in tomato sauce also lingers in the mouth I find but coffee with it is just right ha. I'm sure theres some kind of psychological fix associated to such fasting..not that its proper fasting because of the beans but...its part of the way. I definitely feel like I'm testing myself on the occasions I do this..its not often but occasionally....and I feel good about myself afterwards. do other understand this process?? I think also it relates to a certain character...I mean I'm the type who will walk a number of miles rather then hail a taxi..many wont do that today. another example is...I wont buy a shiny new gadget just for the sake of it when an old object is re-serviceable. or.....my neighbours or friends have modern shiny newish cars. I maybe could go out and buy a new Porsche but chooses to drive around in a 16 year old car which is perfectly good etc etc maybe its the Hippy in me?
Sunday, 22 December 2013
Christmas 2013 retail wars
Well..on Saturday 21st December I did the last part of my Christmas shopping. I planned it good and left the house with a confident smile on my face at 8am. I had 3 different supermarkets to visit for food and chocolate goodies to round off the presents. I estimated I could visit all three and accomplish my mission in say around 2 hours as they were quite close to one another. then I had to nip into town to choose the last of the presents I needed to buy for a close friend. town was only 3 miles away but I feared parking the car might be harder this time of year being so busy with last minute Christmas shoppers. but luckily it will still be early I thought to myself putting aside any fears ha.
I arrive at my first supermarket at 8-15am. There a little doubt crept in as there were already medium sized queues at the check out. did they open earliler this morning for christmas I wondered? I was also surprised to see pallets parked in the isles with frenzied staff still packing goodies onto the over flowing shelves. regardless I scurried around with my trolly with wonky wheel and managed to avoid the small groups of children running around harassing their stressed mothers for sweets which were conveniently placed low on the shelves at their eye level...clever marketing there I thought to myself. I queued at the check out for what seemed like ages and finally handed my money over to the sweaty check out lady who was complaining she went out drinking last night and was nursing a bad hangover. she obviously wasnt over flowing with christmas cheer and really didnt want to be there. I felt for her and almost bent down to give her a hug in sympathy but stopped myself thinking..um at my age it might be misinterpreted as assault by a dirty old man on a young shop assistant...I could picture the headlines now in my local rag ha.
Off and onward I steamed off to my second supermarket. my estimated timing was totally out now as I'd spent over an hour in the last place. This new place was huge like a warehouse of food cum tinsel hanging palace. they had really gone to town on the Christmas decorations here and it looked yummy. as I entered the doors I was a wee bit dazzled by the Christmasy bright lights and silver and gold baubles and Santas Raindeers and Elves.. add to that members of staff dressed up in weird hobbit like costumes with permanently held smiles on their over made up faces...how weird they looked like they had escaped from a Hollywood film set of Harry Potter ha. as I entered further into this magical tinsel hanging winter wonderland complete with piped Christmas carols over the PA system I almost forgot why I was there? my imaginary shopping list in my head had escaped thanks to all my senses being bombarded by a Bling attack. it was like over dosing on drugs as I wandered aimlessly through the asles. good job they dont breathalyse for being stoned in charge of a shopping trolly.
As I tried to regain control of my senses I almost bowled into a lady sat at a small stall offering free mince pies and a tot of Sherry to those who caught her eye. in my trance like state I grabbed with both hands and sat happily on a box of tinned peas to enjoy these free treats and found myself people watching for a few minutes, At Christmas time you certainly see all shades of human life amongst the supermarket asles. young married couples arguing quietly as they cant agree on what to choose. screaming demanding children stressing their mums out dragging her to the sweet shelves with her over flowing trolly stacked with enough food to feed a football team...how long is Christmas again? guys roaming with that wanting look upon their faces desperately trying to find the right present for their wives of girl friends..especially funny in the Lingerie dept as their cheeks tend to blush up when female shop assistants look their way haha. little old ladies storming around knocking into folk like they're on a mission. I lost count of the number of 60s plus females who barged into me almost knocking me flying. leaving their mark in the way of a bruise. I shall never look at sweet old Grannies in the same light anymore. amongst all this human frenzy of a mosh pit I spot a Pensioner couple totally oblivious to the surrounding mayhem casually strolling along hand in hand...how lovely.
Eventually I do find what I'm looking for though and fight my way to the checkout. another long wait as over spilling trollies are emptied onto the conveyer belt in front of me. the poor woman on the till has the speed and skills of a juggler as she scans each item in lightning speed causing a little bleep sound on the machine. reminded me of a hospital heart monitor and the hope I survive todays madness not to end up attached to one. a smile came to my face as a shop assistant dressed in a Santa outfit filled my bags for me wishing me a Merry Christmas as I departed but I didnt have the heart to argue the point...I was so tempted to say look around! packed my car and headed for the next Retail palace warehouse my last one of three ha. but I neednt have bothered really as I couldnt even get in the car park. honestly it was full with queues of cars waiting to get in..I dont belieeeve it! I decided to dump my plan as stress was manipulating my face at this stage so headed to town only 2 miles away to find my friends present.
I head for my usual side streets that offers free parking. no point in going to the multi story as they're full too and the council has just upped the prices to park. so much for encouraging shopping in town let alone Christmas cheer. but again I neednt have bothered as I came across two guys arguing in the street over who was first in turn to pull into a vacant space. one is red faced and screaming at the top of his voice "you jumped the queue you arse hole"...oh dear so very different to the Christmas message of good will to your fellow man at this time of year. later I'm strolling the busy streets and shops in the hope of achieving my mission but losing faith quickly as I'm pushed and shoved along. nobody has time anymore to stop and chat. everyone has an anguished looked in their eyes as they dash from here to there carrier bags and kids in tow. my tinsel colored dream eariler in the day has descended into a christmas Carol nitemare complete with Scrooge in the corner winking out the corner of his eye. Theres a chill in the air and I'm going home! MERRY CHRISTMAS...Bar Humbug! CALLEN
PS. Wise Words........." Never trust anyone with a perfect reputation.....For they are inexperienced in Life"
Tuesday, 27 December 2011
2012 end of illegal war in Irag
So that's it then. The Iraq War is at an end. The long awaited conclusion as the final US soldiers leave the country, closing the gate behind them with a kick.
That's it. The end. Forget the lies. Forget the war crimes. Forget mistreating and killing defenceless prisoners. Remember the victory instead. Mr Obama needs the big-up before next year's elections.
But, of course, the war isn't over any more than Vietnam came to an end for the poor American vets who count their days ekeing out an existence.
In Iraq the violence continues, albeit intermittently. And there will be no comfort for the families of those who died, or those dreadfully injured in body and mind.
Media attention has, of course, been on the thousands of western soldiers that will never return. As if anyone from outside can truly grasp losing loved ones in a war so damningly dishonest, purposeless, wasteful and evil.But nowhere is the attention given to the 150,000 Iraqis killed, a number which remains uncertain because nobody from the Alliance counted them. The same for the lack of support for the hundreds of thousands wounded or who will spend the rest of their days suffering from the effects of uranium bullets and other accursed modern war weaponry.
Is the war really at an end when the USA intend to build a gigantic embassy in Iraq with, according to some commentators, up to 13,000 employees, including private sector mercenaries who have shown themselves to be willing to shoot first and ask questions later, in the good old traditions of the Wild West?
Is the war at an end with western dominance eyeing up the loathsome Iran and Syria?
I could write volumes about Iraq, and the criminal acts perpetrated by allied forces there.
Plaid Cymru opposed the war from its first jingoistic origins. Later we tried to impeach Tony Blair before realising that the other parties wouldn't scrutinise the behaviour of a man who, incredibly, is now a peace envoy in the middle east.
George Bush's policy appeared so pointless, filled with black humour from the moment that preparations for war in Iraq began following 9/11, on the same grounds as if after Pearl Harbour the US had begun a war with Mexico.
Was it a pointless war? No chance! The purpose was all too clear, confirming imperial power in an important strategic part of the world already cursed with considerable wealth. Woe is Syria. Woe is Iran.
That's it. The end. Forget the lies. Forget the war crimes. Forget mistreating and killing defenceless prisoners. Remember the victory instead. Mr Obama needs the big-up before next year's elections.
But, of course, the war isn't over any more than Vietnam came to an end for the poor American vets who count their days ekeing out an existence.
In Iraq the violence continues, albeit intermittently. And there will be no comfort for the families of those who died, or those dreadfully injured in body and mind.
Media attention has, of course, been on the thousands of western soldiers that will never return. As if anyone from outside can truly grasp losing loved ones in a war so damningly dishonest, purposeless, wasteful and evil.But nowhere is the attention given to the 150,000 Iraqis killed, a number which remains uncertain because nobody from the Alliance counted them. The same for the lack of support for the hundreds of thousands wounded or who will spend the rest of their days suffering from the effects of uranium bullets and other accursed modern war weaponry.
Is the war really at an end when the USA intend to build a gigantic embassy in Iraq with, according to some commentators, up to 13,000 employees, including private sector mercenaries who have shown themselves to be willing to shoot first and ask questions later, in the good old traditions of the Wild West?
Is the war at an end with western dominance eyeing up the loathsome Iran and Syria?
I could write volumes about Iraq, and the criminal acts perpetrated by allied forces there.
Plaid Cymru opposed the war from its first jingoistic origins. Later we tried to impeach Tony Blair before realising that the other parties wouldn't scrutinise the behaviour of a man who, incredibly, is now a peace envoy in the middle east.
George Bush's policy appeared so pointless, filled with black humour from the moment that preparations for war in Iraq began following 9/11, on the same grounds as if after Pearl Harbour the US had begun a war with Mexico.
Was it a pointless war? No chance! The purpose was all too clear, confirming imperial power in an important strategic part of the world already cursed with considerable wealth. Woe is Syria. Woe is Iran.
Saturday, 17 December 2011
no more heroes anymore....
We all know life is little more then a short journey. more shorter for some then others. we try to cram as much as we can into that space of time....some manage to fill it with so much and shine above the crowd so much so that we cant help but notice them and be influenced by them. The mass modern media machine ensures they get noticed by millions across the globe. This man stood out because he wasnt afraid to challenge the rich and powerful...to criticise them and expose what he considered to be wrong or unjust regardless. he was an academic and a deep thinker..he was courageous and stubborn..he was rich and could so easily have lived a quiet cosy safe life going with the flow but...he chose to rattle cages and defend the little man making many enemies in the process, an opinionated loud mouth..a trouble maker..a whistle blower..an angry rebel..a traitor to his class system etc etc oh lord wouldnt this world be a worser place without men of conscience? if such a thing as a hero exists or is a valued thing then he was that to me. I am sad today...I feel an emptiness inside.I feel more alone in this crazy world..why? because one of my heroes just died! CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS Journalist/Author/Social Commentator/Academic etc has died aged 62 of cancer...R.I.P. HITCH!
[Obituary]
'Over the course of his career the self-confessed contrarian gleefully picked fights with political opponents, Nobel Peace Prize winners and religious believers of all faiths.
He fired his trademark put-downs and scathing critiques at figures such as Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton and Mother Teresa.
Family ties were no barrier either. He famously fell out with his brother, Mail On Sunday journalist Peter, though the pair were reconciled.
Hitchens published scores of books, thousands of articles and made countless television appearances where he could always be relied upon to provide a stream of serious but witty put-downs.
The publication of his 2007 book God Is Not Great made him a major celebrity in his adopted homeland of the United States, and he happily took on the role of the country's best-known atheist.
He maintained his devout atheism after being diagnosed with cancer in 2010, telling one interviewer: "No evidence or argument has yet been presented which would change my mind. But I like surprises."
The Anglo-American iconoclast – he became a United States citizen in 2007 – had very traditional English beginnings. The son of a naval officer, he was born in Portsmouth and educated at private school and Oxford University.
His student days set the pattern for the rest of his life and he freely admitted living a split existence, spending his days as a campaigning left-wing socialist and his nights wining and dining with the great and the good of Oxford.
Strong drink and political argument would remain among his chief pleasures for the rest of his life.
His early career in journalism saw him write for left-wing weekly The New Statesman where he became associated with a group of young writers including Martin Amis, Ian McEwan and Salman Rushdie.
Those friendships endured but many old comrades turned their back on him when he supported the invasion of Iraq in 2003.
He famously traded insults with George Galloway who described him as "a drink-soaked former Trotskyist popinjay".
Hitchens was promoting his memoirs, Hitch-22, when he was diagnosed with cancer.
He did not stop working, telling one interviewer: "I was very afraid that it would stop me writing. I was really petrified with fear about that because I thought that would, among other things, diminish my will to live.
"Being a writer is what I am, rather than what I do."
Hitchens is survived by his wife and three children.'
.....................................................................................
[Related article]
'It’s strange to mourn the passing of a person you’ve never met. It feels hollow, just a little unjustifiable, and as though you’re somewhat unequipped for the undertaking. Usually we are left with a myriad of moments to recollect and reconcile, to render into something approaching the complexity of life. Here we are left holding scraps of paper, dog-eared and lovingly wrecked, that we must read again for clues, or even simply the pleasure of a previously overlooked aphorism.
For those of us who only read (and watched and heard) Christopher Hitchens, who were never lucky enough to play spectator to the late night drinking and later night writing, who had to wait until the morning to see in print the fierce disputation and bone-dry wit that marked his life, the hole left by his death is not a dramatic wrench to the heart, but one that will appear more slowly, deepening and widening as his absence is felt more and more with every passing event. Why? Because Hitchens was not a stock figure who could be rolled out to offer controversy. He was a journalist who made himself vital, who – as he tells us in his memoir – was constantly nagged by the feeling of being “found out” at any moment.
For Hitch, it seems to those of us who truly admired him, was not simply an atheist, a polemicist, and least of all a contrarian. Nor was he a poster boy the left, a banner boy for Iraq, or the harbinger of the apocalypse. He was, in a small part, the 21st century’s answer to the enlightenment. He stood, first and formost, for thought. Thought that would always – by definition – question inherited truth and inherited experts.Thought that could break the chain and cull the living flower. In fact, he can be - and often is – mentioned alongside Dostoyevsky, Voltaire, Orwell and Trotsky not for what he thought, but for how he thought. If, as Joseph Conrad wrote, criticism is the fine flower in the garden of letters, Hitch – before a culling of a more brutal kind – was amongst the finest of the season.
It is not exactly true to say that I have had no ‘real’ contact with the man. After being given his e-mail address by a colleague (upon request) I wrote to offer my condolences and thanks. Asking for some reassurance that the itch to scribble is at least worth scratching he replied (in lightning speed):
“Pay heed to Rainer Marie Rilke’s question about whether you could go on living if you were prevented from writing. Once answer “no”, and the lesser problems fall away. This is simply because you have chosen to do what you should and must and are immune from petit-bourgeois regrets about other career-paths not taken. Then it begins, and you have a life and not an ‘occupation’.”
This is the great gift of the hitch. His lust for the living, the documentation and the criticism of life has cut a path that we are implored to follow. Especially those of us who, at the start of our journey, look upon the road less travelled by and notice its general lack of congestion. Even now, in the response to his death, coverage has been painfully predictable. Take the BBC who, in one of the worst mischaracterisations of a career since Darwins deathbed recanting, claimed Hitchen’s “called himself a contrarian.” It wouldn’t be so bad if a 10-minute YouTube spiral didn’t so easily reveal that ‘contrarian’ was a label against which he regularly railed, and for which he lambasted his publishers.
However, stranger still have been the stock responses, which were published with such speed that it would seem they have been written for weeks. And as though confirming the conspiracy, the lines, the conclusions, even the pithy turns of phrase, have been heard before, everyday. From diagnosis to departure, the sycophancy has been shocking. An event hosted by Stephen Fry on South Bank, which saw Hitch replaced with touching camaraderie by his closest friends (and Sean Penn), was so sickeningly fawning that a circle-jerk would have ended more tastefully. It was a memorial service without the casket. And how its subject must have blushed. Hitchens was not Mother Theresa; those of us who loved him should not fall victim to the same candy-coated canonisation as those who loved her. We are better than that.
We must remember him for who he was; one of us. One of a “stupid, poorly-evolved mammalian species, whose pre-frontal lobes are too small, and adrenalin glands too big, whose thumb-finger opposition isn’t all that it might be, who is afraid of the dark, and afraid to die.”
Admittedly, though, a remarkably good example of one.
As of this morning we have lost one of our best. We have been left standing in the dark, holding a candle lit at both ends and arms filled with scraps of paper, dog-eared and lovingly wrecked, the cover of which reads:
“Beware the irrational, however seductive. Shun the ‘transcendent’ and all who invite you to subordinate or annihilate yourself. Distrust compassion; prefer dignity for yourself and others. Don’t be afraid to be thought arrogant or selfish. Picture all experts as if they were mammals. Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. Seek out argument and disputation for their own sake; the grave will supply plenty of time for silence. Suspect your own motives, and all excuses. Do not live for others any more than you would expect others to live for you.”
[Obituary]
'Over the course of his career the self-confessed contrarian gleefully picked fights with political opponents, Nobel Peace Prize winners and religious believers of all faiths.
He fired his trademark put-downs and scathing critiques at figures such as Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton and Mother Teresa.
Family ties were no barrier either. He famously fell out with his brother, Mail On Sunday journalist Peter, though the pair were reconciled.
Hitchens published scores of books, thousands of articles and made countless television appearances where he could always be relied upon to provide a stream of serious but witty put-downs.
The publication of his 2007 book God Is Not Great made him a major celebrity in his adopted homeland of the United States, and he happily took on the role of the country's best-known atheist.
He maintained his devout atheism after being diagnosed with cancer in 2010, telling one interviewer: "No evidence or argument has yet been presented which would change my mind. But I like surprises."
The Anglo-American iconoclast – he became a United States citizen in 2007 – had very traditional English beginnings. The son of a naval officer, he was born in Portsmouth and educated at private school and Oxford University.
His student days set the pattern for the rest of his life and he freely admitted living a split existence, spending his days as a campaigning left-wing socialist and his nights wining and dining with the great and the good of Oxford.
Strong drink and political argument would remain among his chief pleasures for the rest of his life.
His early career in journalism saw him write for left-wing weekly The New Statesman where he became associated with a group of young writers including Martin Amis, Ian McEwan and Salman Rushdie.
Those friendships endured but many old comrades turned their back on him when he supported the invasion of Iraq in 2003.
He famously traded insults with George Galloway who described him as "a drink-soaked former Trotskyist popinjay".
Hitchens was promoting his memoirs, Hitch-22, when he was diagnosed with cancer.
He did not stop working, telling one interviewer: "I was very afraid that it would stop me writing. I was really petrified with fear about that because I thought that would, among other things, diminish my will to live.
"Being a writer is what I am, rather than what I do."
Hitchens is survived by his wife and three children.'
.....................................................................................
[Related article]
'It’s strange to mourn the passing of a person you’ve never met. It feels hollow, just a little unjustifiable, and as though you’re somewhat unequipped for the undertaking. Usually we are left with a myriad of moments to recollect and reconcile, to render into something approaching the complexity of life. Here we are left holding scraps of paper, dog-eared and lovingly wrecked, that we must read again for clues, or even simply the pleasure of a previously overlooked aphorism.
For those of us who only read (and watched and heard) Christopher Hitchens, who were never lucky enough to play spectator to the late night drinking and later night writing, who had to wait until the morning to see in print the fierce disputation and bone-dry wit that marked his life, the hole left by his death is not a dramatic wrench to the heart, but one that will appear more slowly, deepening and widening as his absence is felt more and more with every passing event. Why? Because Hitchens was not a stock figure who could be rolled out to offer controversy. He was a journalist who made himself vital, who – as he tells us in his memoir – was constantly nagged by the feeling of being “found out” at any moment.
For Hitch, it seems to those of us who truly admired him, was not simply an atheist, a polemicist, and least of all a contrarian. Nor was he a poster boy the left, a banner boy for Iraq, or the harbinger of the apocalypse. He was, in a small part, the 21st century’s answer to the enlightenment. He stood, first and formost, for thought. Thought that would always – by definition – question inherited truth and inherited experts.Thought that could break the chain and cull the living flower. In fact, he can be - and often is – mentioned alongside Dostoyevsky, Voltaire, Orwell and Trotsky not for what he thought, but for how he thought. If, as Joseph Conrad wrote, criticism is the fine flower in the garden of letters, Hitch – before a culling of a more brutal kind – was amongst the finest of the season.
It is not exactly true to say that I have had no ‘real’ contact with the man. After being given his e-mail address by a colleague (upon request) I wrote to offer my condolences and thanks. Asking for some reassurance that the itch to scribble is at least worth scratching he replied (in lightning speed):
“Pay heed to Rainer Marie Rilke’s question about whether you could go on living if you were prevented from writing. Once answer “no”, and the lesser problems fall away. This is simply because you have chosen to do what you should and must and are immune from petit-bourgeois regrets about other career-paths not taken. Then it begins, and you have a life and not an ‘occupation’.”
This is the great gift of the hitch. His lust for the living, the documentation and the criticism of life has cut a path that we are implored to follow. Especially those of us who, at the start of our journey, look upon the road less travelled by and notice its general lack of congestion. Even now, in the response to his death, coverage has been painfully predictable. Take the BBC who, in one of the worst mischaracterisations of a career since Darwins deathbed recanting, claimed Hitchen’s “called himself a contrarian.” It wouldn’t be so bad if a 10-minute YouTube spiral didn’t so easily reveal that ‘contrarian’ was a label against which he regularly railed, and for which he lambasted his publishers.
However, stranger still have been the stock responses, which were published with such speed that it would seem they have been written for weeks. And as though confirming the conspiracy, the lines, the conclusions, even the pithy turns of phrase, have been heard before, everyday. From diagnosis to departure, the sycophancy has been shocking. An event hosted by Stephen Fry on South Bank, which saw Hitch replaced with touching camaraderie by his closest friends (and Sean Penn), was so sickeningly fawning that a circle-jerk would have ended more tastefully. It was a memorial service without the casket. And how its subject must have blushed. Hitchens was not Mother Theresa; those of us who loved him should not fall victim to the same candy-coated canonisation as those who loved her. We are better than that.
We must remember him for who he was; one of us. One of a “stupid, poorly-evolved mammalian species, whose pre-frontal lobes are too small, and adrenalin glands too big, whose thumb-finger opposition isn’t all that it might be, who is afraid of the dark, and afraid to die.”
Admittedly, though, a remarkably good example of one.
As of this morning we have lost one of our best. We have been left standing in the dark, holding a candle lit at both ends and arms filled with scraps of paper, dog-eared and lovingly wrecked, the cover of which reads:
“Beware the irrational, however seductive. Shun the ‘transcendent’ and all who invite you to subordinate or annihilate yourself. Distrust compassion; prefer dignity for yourself and others. Don’t be afraid to be thought arrogant or selfish. Picture all experts as if they were mammals. Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. Seek out argument and disputation for their own sake; the grave will supply plenty of time for silence. Suspect your own motives, and all excuses. Do not live for others any more than you would expect others to live for you.”
Tuesday, 27 September 2011
Hollywood reminders of a living nitemare
I sat in front of the TV getting quite emotional....tearful in fact. I felt quite silly really as this had happened before and I should have been prepared at least or hardened to this particular scene but no...it effected me yet again much the same as before and my raw emotions just took over. I am talking about the work of that genius film Director Steven Spielberg and his award winning classic film 'Saving Private Ryan'. Its the end scene..remember it? its where the main character of the story James Frances Ryan [Private Ryan] is now a world weary grandfather in his 60s who has traveled to the old battlefields of France with his extended family consisting of his loving wife...sons/daughters and grandchildren in order to pay his respects to his old fallen comrades of decades before. In a way its a gesture of respect and closure for him as he enters his twilight years and to help the younger members of his family understand the huge sacrifices made for them by his generation to ensure their happiness/freedom. Its a very emotive scene as the camera pans in close to his face...eyes that tell a bleak story and tears slowly appear. he chokes on his words as he speaks to the gravestone of his fallen comrade saying that hes tried to lead a good fruitful life and followed his advice from all those years ago in that war torn landscape. His wife who is standing behind him notices his deep upset and moves forward to comfort him...he turns to her and asks her..."have I lead a good life?...tell me I've lead a good life"...etc etc its a very moving scene and translates perfectly the complete horror/waste of war.
Its funny I simply cant watch that film without it ending the same every time with me ie in tears and very shook up. why? I guess because I am a very caring sensitive person allied to a hard shell also. if you were to ask me what was the most shocking event in the 20th Century for me personally I wouldnt quote national disasters that killed thousands of innocent people...nor would I quote deliberate criminal acts of evil....or full scale wars that ripped a generation of healthy youth apart and solved very little etc but I would quote the orchestrated evil of the Holocaust during the 1930s/40s that was dealt to truly innocent men woman and children as the one event that effected me most even though I wasnt born until 5 years after its end and can only rely on history text mostly to understand it. plus of course the horrific film footage recovered and actual witness accounts. The passing of years since that terrible event which adds up to 66 now hasnt even slightly diminished the agonising impact of what happened to me. ones rational mind and sense of incredibility keeps the painful thoughts of it fresh in my head because I dont want to accept civilised human beings could do such an evil thing because of a Political Ideology but....they did without much question. The film 'Saving Private Ryan' relates to and reminds me of that period and its crazy events hence my deep emotions while watching that scene above..that brave good people laid down their lives to rid the world of unadulterated evil Ideology..only fools will will be insensitive toward such a thing.
History is my thing and I do enjoy researching about a lot of it particularly the mayhem of the Second World War..its reasons and causes..its thinking and mechanisms that allowed events to unfold as they did. Armies armed to the teeth and facing one another on the battlefield because of some Political differences is one thing and history books glorify the colorful drama with feelings of National pride and evolution with god on our side tosh...but for a Democratically elected government to brainwash its citizens in an evil racial way against sections of your own community and then declare war on parts of the civilian population leading to their murders in especially constructed murder factories is almost inconceivable to a civilised person..how could that evolve?..happen?...how? because of this real human tragedy that happened I have always been drawn to look for answers about the Holocaust in an attempt to understand somehow. War films always related to this in parts for me..how could it not? hence I have researched it thoroughly over the years and snippets always comes to the surface of what happened to ordinary innocent people caught up in that sad page of history through no fault of their own...every day events like.....
When the German army conquered land in their invasion of Russia in June 1941 during operation Barbarossa they had strict instructions to show no mercy to the civilian population of the villages/towns/cities they over run. that the Peasants were inferior and of the level of animals...that all Jewish families and Communist party supporters were to be shot on sight coldly..men women and children...every building were to be torched as you passed through and if the buildings inhabitants ran out of the burning buildings just shoot them....this became the norm for almost every fighting unit in the field with some exceptions. That whole communities were to be rounded up and killed. In some regions there were even recorded instances of old ex soldiers who Fought for the German army during World War One coming out wearing their old medals to greet the advancing German army only to be beaten and cruelly killed by the troops as they openly mocked their victims. How they killed the children in front of their parents just to maximise the agony aspects of their evil deeds.
In the specially constructed Concentration Camps or death factories scattered alover occupied Europe the regime was of hate and suffering daily. Children were automatically separated from parents as was men from women. The young/strong were put to grueling work on starvation rations of watery vegetable soup that caused almost instant diarrhea and dysentry. Their survival period was a few weeks usually. Children were either killed straight away by lethal injection or medically experimented on...they were all condemned to death anyway so...women were worked to death or served as slaves in the service parts of the camp and the turnover was again high because of the lack of food and beatings.
Even though the camps were always full to over flowing daily trainloads of Jews arrived from all parts of Europe usually 20-40,000 at a time and sometimes twice in a 24 hr period. these unfortunate victims which consisted of whole families of mum/dad with children and grand parents to had already endured months/years of ill treatment and partial starvation in segregated ghetto areas of occupied countries...had just suffered a journey of often days without food/water in cattle trucks to arrive weak and confused/fearful for their families to be herded in their thousands by sadistic guards with vicious dogs and whips to be split up ie woman on one side men on the other. children taken away with the old and crippled/infirm. told they must enter large sheds and strip off in order to take a communal shower and be deloused before going to the camp. to be herded naked and afraid down specially shielded laneways often with fake signs to delude them and played music to end up in large fake shower rooms that held a thousand at a time only to be cruelly gassed. the guards boasted they could clear a train load of 30,000 people from disembarking to to the burning death pits at the rear of the gas chambers ready to be buried or burned etc in 2-3 hours...industrially efficient and impressive if it wasnt for the human victims.
I am reminded of the thousands women awaiting their turn to be showered standing often in freezing weather completely naked half knowing they were about to be killed...standing huddled and shivering in a sea of human flesh and many emptying their bowls on the hard concrete floors because of sheer fear..how some were so desperate they committed suicide by slitting their wrists/necks to end the agony and some helping their grand parents or older children to do the same. I am haunted by the thousands of naked men suffering the same fate naked in long rows who were hurriedly taken before the women to their deaths as the guards feared more resistance hence they treated more brutally with whips snarling dogs who bit their naked flesh as they passed and some guards openly used swords to to wound and increase the fear in the crowd...those who found the strength/courage to resist who were few in number were instantly shot dead on the spot....imagine the noise and confusion of 30-40.000 people being processed at the beginning and two short hours later a deathly silence hung over the whole area...all dead and being buried or burned in pits..piles of human flesh....twisted hurt cold faces...erased from this world...blood to be cleaned away and any clues that this place was busy with human presence...ready for another train load a few hours later...can this thing be real? did it really happen?
I have only touched the surface of facts here..of what took place in a cold blooded efficient industrialised manner. There are enough agonising individual stories that would take a life time to tell.....yes war films remind me of the whole picture of past events of that period. it is important to remember dont you think? we must remember in the hope it will prevent ordinary people in extraordinary situations in the future from not doing the same again..yes it was ordinary people who worked the mechanics of those camps..who worked the trains..who did the admin..who cooked the guards meals..who followed orders without question...we must not forget that! Thank you Steven Spielberg for reminding me. CALLEN
Words of Wisdom......."Only clowns and the empty minded laugh all the time"
Its funny I simply cant watch that film without it ending the same every time with me ie in tears and very shook up. why? I guess because I am a very caring sensitive person allied to a hard shell also. if you were to ask me what was the most shocking event in the 20th Century for me personally I wouldnt quote national disasters that killed thousands of innocent people...nor would I quote deliberate criminal acts of evil....or full scale wars that ripped a generation of healthy youth apart and solved very little etc but I would quote the orchestrated evil of the Holocaust during the 1930s/40s that was dealt to truly innocent men woman and children as the one event that effected me most even though I wasnt born until 5 years after its end and can only rely on history text mostly to understand it. plus of course the horrific film footage recovered and actual witness accounts. The passing of years since that terrible event which adds up to 66 now hasnt even slightly diminished the agonising impact of what happened to me. ones rational mind and sense of incredibility keeps the painful thoughts of it fresh in my head because I dont want to accept civilised human beings could do such an evil thing because of a Political Ideology but....they did without much question. The film 'Saving Private Ryan' relates to and reminds me of that period and its crazy events hence my deep emotions while watching that scene above..that brave good people laid down their lives to rid the world of unadulterated evil Ideology..only fools will will be insensitive toward such a thing.
History is my thing and I do enjoy researching about a lot of it particularly the mayhem of the Second World War..its reasons and causes..its thinking and mechanisms that allowed events to unfold as they did. Armies armed to the teeth and facing one another on the battlefield because of some Political differences is one thing and history books glorify the colorful drama with feelings of National pride and evolution with god on our side tosh...but for a Democratically elected government to brainwash its citizens in an evil racial way against sections of your own community and then declare war on parts of the civilian population leading to their murders in especially constructed murder factories is almost inconceivable to a civilised person..how could that evolve?..happen?...how? because of this real human tragedy that happened I have always been drawn to look for answers about the Holocaust in an attempt to understand somehow. War films always related to this in parts for me..how could it not? hence I have researched it thoroughly over the years and snippets always comes to the surface of what happened to ordinary innocent people caught up in that sad page of history through no fault of their own...every day events like.....
When the German army conquered land in their invasion of Russia in June 1941 during operation Barbarossa they had strict instructions to show no mercy to the civilian population of the villages/towns/cities they over run. that the Peasants were inferior and of the level of animals...that all Jewish families and Communist party supporters were to be shot on sight coldly..men women and children...every building were to be torched as you passed through and if the buildings inhabitants ran out of the burning buildings just shoot them....this became the norm for almost every fighting unit in the field with some exceptions. That whole communities were to be rounded up and killed. In some regions there were even recorded instances of old ex soldiers who Fought for the German army during World War One coming out wearing their old medals to greet the advancing German army only to be beaten and cruelly killed by the troops as they openly mocked their victims. How they killed the children in front of their parents just to maximise the agony aspects of their evil deeds.
In the specially constructed Concentration Camps or death factories scattered alover occupied Europe the regime was of hate and suffering daily. Children were automatically separated from parents as was men from women. The young/strong were put to grueling work on starvation rations of watery vegetable soup that caused almost instant diarrhea and dysentry. Their survival period was a few weeks usually. Children were either killed straight away by lethal injection or medically experimented on...they were all condemned to death anyway so...women were worked to death or served as slaves in the service parts of the camp and the turnover was again high because of the lack of food and beatings.
Even though the camps were always full to over flowing daily trainloads of Jews arrived from all parts of Europe usually 20-40,000 at a time and sometimes twice in a 24 hr period. these unfortunate victims which consisted of whole families of mum/dad with children and grand parents to had already endured months/years of ill treatment and partial starvation in segregated ghetto areas of occupied countries...had just suffered a journey of often days without food/water in cattle trucks to arrive weak and confused/fearful for their families to be herded in their thousands by sadistic guards with vicious dogs and whips to be split up ie woman on one side men on the other. children taken away with the old and crippled/infirm. told they must enter large sheds and strip off in order to take a communal shower and be deloused before going to the camp. to be herded naked and afraid down specially shielded laneways often with fake signs to delude them and played music to end up in large fake shower rooms that held a thousand at a time only to be cruelly gassed. the guards boasted they could clear a train load of 30,000 people from disembarking to to the burning death pits at the rear of the gas chambers ready to be buried or burned etc in 2-3 hours...industrially efficient and impressive if it wasnt for the human victims.
I am reminded of the thousands women awaiting their turn to be showered standing often in freezing weather completely naked half knowing they were about to be killed...standing huddled and shivering in a sea of human flesh and many emptying their bowls on the hard concrete floors because of sheer fear..how some were so desperate they committed suicide by slitting their wrists/necks to end the agony and some helping their grand parents or older children to do the same. I am haunted by the thousands of naked men suffering the same fate naked in long rows who were hurriedly taken before the women to their deaths as the guards feared more resistance hence they treated more brutally with whips snarling dogs who bit their naked flesh as they passed and some guards openly used swords to to wound and increase the fear in the crowd...those who found the strength/courage to resist who were few in number were instantly shot dead on the spot....imagine the noise and confusion of 30-40.000 people being processed at the beginning and two short hours later a deathly silence hung over the whole area...all dead and being buried or burned in pits..piles of human flesh....twisted hurt cold faces...erased from this world...blood to be cleaned away and any clues that this place was busy with human presence...ready for another train load a few hours later...can this thing be real? did it really happen?
I have only touched the surface of facts here..of what took place in a cold blooded efficient industrialised manner. There are enough agonising individual stories that would take a life time to tell.....yes war films remind me of the whole picture of past events of that period. it is important to remember dont you think? we must remember in the hope it will prevent ordinary people in extraordinary situations in the future from not doing the same again..yes it was ordinary people who worked the mechanics of those camps..who worked the trains..who did the admin..who cooked the guards meals..who followed orders without question...we must not forget that! Thank you Steven Spielberg for reminding me. CALLEN
Words of Wisdom......."Only clowns and the empty minded laugh all the time"
Sunday, 28 August 2011
A lost friend....
Life back in 2005 was pretty good over all. I was always a free spirit with a very open mind although this was entwined with a stabilising framework of traditional values to..I may have had periods of being wild and rebellious but that didnt mean reckless. I flirted with the social sex drugs rock'n'roll life style theme with music at its centre namely the regions live rock scene which involved music pubs/venues/festivals and places to hang out fellow Alternative types. I had a comrade in arms who shared my love of this music influenced world called Gary. he was 4 years younger then I and we grew up in the same small Suffolk market town here in Eastern England. Although we didnt really know each other as children but were thrown together in our late teens because of our love of Rock music and visiting local venues. We became firm friends and hung out together more and more through the years because of the music link.Gary had never married and during this period I was divorced which provided plenty of free time for social activities.
We would routinely arrange meet ups for gigs and festivals often traveling hundreds of miles for a single event and often did alniters at Nottinghams famous 'Rock City' club which involved a 300 mile round trip driving as well as 8 hours of hard rocking out at the club and on the dance floor...of course drugs played a small part here in keeping the pace going and amplifying the 'good' feelings of the whole music/club experience..there was nothing negative about it at all apart from the long sleep over after arriving home from a marathon session lasting 20 hours non stop! phew! As well as crazy gigs we'd meet up for day trips out and to meet other rock friends or to shop may etc etc usual things that friends do so...we were pretty close and on the same wavelengh on many levels including things such as views on politics...music..fashion..women..life in general. We had a respect for one another to and enjoyed each others company...friendships like that are valued regardless of sex.
Gary also worked part time for a regional music Promoter which had added benefits on a regular basis. His promoter boss/friend would do a mix of local music acts and 'named' acts from yesteryear like Status Quo/Elton John/Uriah Heep/Golden Earring/Wishbone Ash etc etc plus many quality Tribute acts. Gary would often slip me in on such tours as his assistant or driver meaning I would get to enjoy behind the scenes experiences of yesterdays music heroes as well as meeting them and often their families. I met many Named acts this way and including a fab weekend party at Richard Bransons Oxfordshire estate. This extension due to his job just contributed not only to our chosen social lifestyle but also to the closeness of our friendship. It became the norm to meet up most weekends and chat on the phone every few days about life things..plus when Gary found himself unemployed from his day job I employed him part time in my then business. Life was full..steady..and fun...as it should be.
During the hazy hot summer of 2005 and umpteen hectic gig meetings which exhausted us through the sheer excess of just having a good time and not wanting to stop Gary got one of those irritating summer colds which resulted in a persistent cough. we all get them occasionally and think nothing of it. They usually just disappear of their own accord. but Garys didnt and went on for weeks resulting in him taking medication from the local chemist. after this failed to work he routinely visited his local doctors who prescribed yet more anti-biotic pills. back to gigging then. We had a list of different bands and gigs far afield we wanted to go to over the coming weeks hence more planning and driving so..we emerged ourselves back into the swirl of things. Gary just loved the setting and atmosphere of a live gig with a quality band and if all the elements were in place it really was an emotional high for both of us..the power of music huh. it really does effect the soul heart and mind if your properly tuned into it.
After another few weeks passed by he told me his bloody cough was still present and although I had noticed the occasional cough cough thought nothing of it because it began to be the norm from him and Gary was not a smoker. he told me he had gone back to the docs a few times and he had agreed he should have a proper checkover at the local clinic. This came and went without any concern but a surprise phone call from Gary changed the feeling of calm...he explained the x-ray at the clinic revealed something and he needed to report to the local hospital for further tests. he was concerned and threw a few reasons/causes by me...I heard myself saying that he shouldnt worry too much and it was just a normal cautionary thing they did and it would amount to nothing...you'll see! but at the back of my mind I did wonder if there was indeed something wrong?
A week later everything changed in our world when his hospital tests had come back. they had found a small dark shadow on garys lung and his blood tests revealed there were irregularities in the cells. he had to stay over in hospital for further testing and the voice on the phone sounded like concealed panic. I did my best to speak him back onto rational thinking as best I could and visited him the next evening. it was odd seeing my friend in a small quietened hospital ward and in his bed pyjamas and speaking in hushed tones when we were both usually in noisy musical environments. he told me what the specialists had said and was remarkably calm as opposed to his veiled panic on the phone just 24 hours previously. They had found a small dark growth on the tip of one of his lungs which was cancerous but a mild form and in its very early stages of developement. They suggested he stayed in hospital and under went a course of radiology and possibly chemotherapy over the next few weeks. He could do most of this as an out patient but they wanted him to stay in for 2-3 weeks so they could closely monitor progress of this treatment.
Gary was in indecisive mode a few days later and became very stubborn. he knew both treatments could result in the loss of his long healthy blonde hair which was a symbol of his rock credentials. he did indeed look the part being 6'-1" tall and slim with that rock singer willowness about him and he looked good in bohemian style rock clothes of which he developed his own unique style. his long flowing locks which went below his shoulders were very much part of the completed look...it wouldnt work bald or even short. I did of course try to talk sense into him regarding that ones health is more important but...you cant stop a steam train in full flight. he asked to see the specialist again to get a detailed account of his growth who informed him that oral medication could also treat it and that radiology/chemotherapy was at this stage an over kill solution offered in choice...that he couldnt guarantee either or both would work...that the growth was minute etc this indecisive analysis convinced Gary that there was a period of wait and see so..he decided to reject the harsher treatments in favor of oral radiation tablets..it was his choice and now he couldnt be budged!
Fast forward a few months and Gary was out of hospital in autumn 2005 and on regular tablets which seemed to do the trick ie the cough was gone and he looked bright'n'healthy again and full of life..the hospital monitored him on a regular basis and reported no problems regarding the growth getting larger or changing...indeed it became smaller. Christmas came and went with a brand new year unfolding 2006 with life things kicking back in and we connected again with the social rock thingy like nothing had happened the previous summer. he continued going for regular checks firstly every 2 weeks..then a month ending up every 3 months so it all appeared good. The 'old' Gary was back and he seemed to display a renewed vigour for life which is usually the case after a cancer scare isnt it. The months rolled on and life was good again. he changed his diet of course and a cleaner lifestyle took form and I think he felt much the better for it. It almost became like a fading memory the events of over a year ago and healthwise everything seemed fine..psychologically everything moved forward and negative thoughts slowly but surely disappeared. suddenly it was almost Christmas 2006..what happened to this past year? its slipped by so fast..cant believe its almost 2007.
It was a cold grueling winter this one and the usual Christmasy things came and went...we battoned down the hatches until the first hint of spring showed its face and then it was time for planning again ie the social calender and holidays etc etc like furry animals emerging from a long winters hibernation rubbing your eyes and eager to get stuck back into living normally again. Sunny March arrived 2007 and it was beautiful..we hit the gig circuit running and our motors were running again...our foots hit the floor and you could hear our engines roar! Gary had met a woman the past month and he liked her a lot. he revealed his feelings to me I guess looking for advice of some kind. I told him that having a love in ones life makes it all complete and even more enjoyable..that a close friendship between mates shouldnt suffer because of it...that if she felt the same toward him then he should invest more of himself into the bludgeoning relationship and see where it flows? he took my advice and offered her more of his social time which I understood so stepped back a little to allow it to grow. a routine emerged where we saw less of one another in favor of his growing love/needs from this woman. instead of the normal 3-4 times per week we used to meet up it dropped to once a week and sometimes less. I accepted that without question..it was early days and new love is all consuming..I understand that.
Something strange happened in mid April 2007 myself and Gary had a silly disagreement over the phone which rarely happened ever but both being strong characters I guess when it does happen its strong. it developed into a heated argument and slamming the phone down in frustration. neither would compromise or give any ground to get beyond it...which was silly and just male pride. I couldnt fathom who started it or fed it to heated proportions? I guess we were both to blame? I thought to myself well sod him..he has his woman now so isnt too bothered with me. it'll blow over in a short time and things will be fine again...lets just have some space between us. April turned into May and the weather was so fine with bright sunshine and the smell of spring hung in the air..that flower scented smell that makes you fell quite heady. I continued going to gigs locally and fully expected to bump into Gary and his woman..thinking we would and that silly disagreement would be forgotten about immediately...but we didnt. I didnt really think it was odd...just thought we were like passing ships in the night and would eventually. a few busy weeks with work my end and I didnt go out one weekend feeling a little exhausted. I almost phoned my friend Gary one evening thinking this was silly as I had missed our regular phone chats and meets.
I received a phone call from another friend on the 29th May whom I hadnt heard from in a while..."Hi I said" "wondered how you were these days"...he sounded sombre and said he was sorry but he was the bringer of bad news! He went on to say he knew myself and Gary had had a falling out a while back so thought it was only right he should inform me of recent events etc..oh god I thought whats happened? his words came out slowly and resonated in my head..."I dont think you knew that Gary was taken into hospital almost a month ago and remains there..that the hospital has told his relatives he wont be leaving and that sadly things arent good...that the cancer he had signs of 2 years previously had re-emerged quickly and unfortunately spread via his blood to his stomach".....oh my god! his words seemed to freeze in my head and numbed my thinking. I couldnt fully take in their meaning? I mean only weeks ago we were together and he was so full of life and healthy etc how could this happen so quickly? why didnt the hospital pick up on it and have some warning? a hundred questions flowed through my mind.
My friend on the phone went on to explain the sequence of events the past 5-6 weeks..apparent Gary had a heavy night of drinking one night while out and brought a curry on the way home..having eaten this he became sick shorty afterwards and brought the meal up. he put it down to being drunk. next few days he couldnt hold his food down for long and developed a feeling of indigestion in his tummy. he thought nothing of it and took pills from the chemist. but much like his persistent cough of a few years ago it wouldnt go away. his feeling of indigestion got steadily worse causing him to phone his doctor as 4 days. he told him to report immediately to the hospital outpatient dept which he did. they took an x-ray and blood test telling him he has to stay in over night as something doesnt look right. They discovered the cancerous growth on his lung to be still there but very small with little change but there were now small growths in the lining of his stomach and it had spread so much it was inoperable...even contemplating removing his whole stomach would not be enough as evidence was seen to show it had spread beyond that.
Gary was given emergency chemotherapy over the next few weeks in a vain attempt to stop the spread and limit the harm and he increasingly needed Morphine to kill the pain. he couldnt hold food down so had to be fed liquids via a tube. his weight loss was fast and his skin color faded but he remained upbeat even after the specialists slowly broke the news to him there was little hope...that he had to prepare himself for the worst. he had friends and family visit him...he listened to his beloved rock music on the bedside radio till the end and the nurse said his music seemed to give him strength. he became painfully thin and needed larger doses of Morphine..his mood slowly sunk toward the end and he became short tempered etc etc I listened to this account on the phone in a state of semi-shock! stunned both by the bad news but also as to why hadnt he contacted me his friend of old to tell me? was he just too stubborn? did he feel betrayed by me some how? was he embarrassed to tell me there was no hope? was he so doped up he couldnt think straight? so many painful questions that mashed my thinking up.
After this shocking phone call/news I immediately phoned the hospitable wanting to arrange a visit. it was late and the night staff were on duty they could tell me very little and suggested I call first thing in the morning. I gave in trying at that late hour and couldnt sleep that night. next morning I phoned the hospital first thing at 8am and had difficulty getting through to the right dept/ward..eventually after being passed onto 3 different staff members a female voice calmly told me that Gary had sadly passed on late last night. that he was calm and sedated with no pain. his younger brother and two other friends were at his bedside so he didnt die alone.....I couldnt believe what I was hearing! She told me that he was listening to his radio at that moment to his favorite rock station..he leaned forward slowly toward his brother and asked him in a hushed voice to hold his hand tightly and he quietly slipped away...tears filled my eyes uncontrollably.
11 days later on another beautifully sunny day mid week Garys funeral took place at the crematorium . I heard he had wanted to be buried but the current laws prevented it because his cancer was a form of toxic asbestosis and only cremation was possible..this had upset him apparently. it was a good turn out..lots of family/friends and aqquaintences..lots of summer flowers. The service was nice and they played 2 of Garys chosen rock tracks over the PA system which broke my heart and I couldnt hold back my emotions at that point...memories flooded my head and I couldnt relate to this whole thing...the music playing in this moment is associated with laughter happiness and our old times together as mates at gigs etc certainly not watching his coffin sliding behind curtains before the hot ovens...its just not real!
Over the next few days I contacted the local radio station and the DJ friend of Gary whom he had be-friended at various gigs agreed with his producers to do a radio tribute to a lost rocker and friend. he played the track from Aerosmith that Gary had been listening to at the moment of passing...so very moving..more tears. I recorded this radio tribute and burned it onto a dvd containing old photos/film of him I had taken over the years in a montage of his life. I handed these out to a few of his family/friends. How does one deal with a sudden loss of someone close? where do you find the answers to so many questions? grief is a lonely burdon to deal with. The rock scene is a lonelier place without you Gary..I miss your laughter...your jokes..I miss your views on life..I miss your spirit..I miss you beside me at gigs always with an opinion on the band...I loved you my friend and I miss you...you were only 52 and so full of life still...I recall what someone told me you said in defiance when you learned that there was little hope of recovery while laying in your hospital bed..you said.."oh well I've had a good 50 years plus..some folk dont get anywhere near that do they"....You may have gone in physical presence but your spirit lives beside me still at gigs and I gain a lot of inspiration from that...I will keep you alive in my thoughts which will be a fitting memorial to you...I lost a friend.... CALLEN
We would routinely arrange meet ups for gigs and festivals often traveling hundreds of miles for a single event and often did alniters at Nottinghams famous 'Rock City' club which involved a 300 mile round trip driving as well as 8 hours of hard rocking out at the club and on the dance floor...of course drugs played a small part here in keeping the pace going and amplifying the 'good' feelings of the whole music/club experience..there was nothing negative about it at all apart from the long sleep over after arriving home from a marathon session lasting 20 hours non stop! phew! As well as crazy gigs we'd meet up for day trips out and to meet other rock friends or to shop may etc etc usual things that friends do so...we were pretty close and on the same wavelengh on many levels including things such as views on politics...music..fashion..women..life in general. We had a respect for one another to and enjoyed each others company...friendships like that are valued regardless of sex.
Gary also worked part time for a regional music Promoter which had added benefits on a regular basis. His promoter boss/friend would do a mix of local music acts and 'named' acts from yesteryear like Status Quo/Elton John/Uriah Heep/Golden Earring/Wishbone Ash etc etc plus many quality Tribute acts. Gary would often slip me in on such tours as his assistant or driver meaning I would get to enjoy behind the scenes experiences of yesterdays music heroes as well as meeting them and often their families. I met many Named acts this way and including a fab weekend party at Richard Bransons Oxfordshire estate. This extension due to his job just contributed not only to our chosen social lifestyle but also to the closeness of our friendship. It became the norm to meet up most weekends and chat on the phone every few days about life things..plus when Gary found himself unemployed from his day job I employed him part time in my then business. Life was full..steady..and fun...as it should be.
During the hazy hot summer of 2005 and umpteen hectic gig meetings which exhausted us through the sheer excess of just having a good time and not wanting to stop Gary got one of those irritating summer colds which resulted in a persistent cough. we all get them occasionally and think nothing of it. They usually just disappear of their own accord. but Garys didnt and went on for weeks resulting in him taking medication from the local chemist. after this failed to work he routinely visited his local doctors who prescribed yet more anti-biotic pills. back to gigging then. We had a list of different bands and gigs far afield we wanted to go to over the coming weeks hence more planning and driving so..we emerged ourselves back into the swirl of things. Gary just loved the setting and atmosphere of a live gig with a quality band and if all the elements were in place it really was an emotional high for both of us..the power of music huh. it really does effect the soul heart and mind if your properly tuned into it.
After another few weeks passed by he told me his bloody cough was still present and although I had noticed the occasional cough cough thought nothing of it because it began to be the norm from him and Gary was not a smoker. he told me he had gone back to the docs a few times and he had agreed he should have a proper checkover at the local clinic. This came and went without any concern but a surprise phone call from Gary changed the feeling of calm...he explained the x-ray at the clinic revealed something and he needed to report to the local hospital for further tests. he was concerned and threw a few reasons/causes by me...I heard myself saying that he shouldnt worry too much and it was just a normal cautionary thing they did and it would amount to nothing...you'll see! but at the back of my mind I did wonder if there was indeed something wrong?
A week later everything changed in our world when his hospital tests had come back. they had found a small dark shadow on garys lung and his blood tests revealed there were irregularities in the cells. he had to stay over in hospital for further testing and the voice on the phone sounded like concealed panic. I did my best to speak him back onto rational thinking as best I could and visited him the next evening. it was odd seeing my friend in a small quietened hospital ward and in his bed pyjamas and speaking in hushed tones when we were both usually in noisy musical environments. he told me what the specialists had said and was remarkably calm as opposed to his veiled panic on the phone just 24 hours previously. They had found a small dark growth on the tip of one of his lungs which was cancerous but a mild form and in its very early stages of developement. They suggested he stayed in hospital and under went a course of radiology and possibly chemotherapy over the next few weeks. He could do most of this as an out patient but they wanted him to stay in for 2-3 weeks so they could closely monitor progress of this treatment.
Gary was in indecisive mode a few days later and became very stubborn. he knew both treatments could result in the loss of his long healthy blonde hair which was a symbol of his rock credentials. he did indeed look the part being 6'-1" tall and slim with that rock singer willowness about him and he looked good in bohemian style rock clothes of which he developed his own unique style. his long flowing locks which went below his shoulders were very much part of the completed look...it wouldnt work bald or even short. I did of course try to talk sense into him regarding that ones health is more important but...you cant stop a steam train in full flight. he asked to see the specialist again to get a detailed account of his growth who informed him that oral medication could also treat it and that radiology/chemotherapy was at this stage an over kill solution offered in choice...that he couldnt guarantee either or both would work...that the growth was minute etc this indecisive analysis convinced Gary that there was a period of wait and see so..he decided to reject the harsher treatments in favor of oral radiation tablets..it was his choice and now he couldnt be budged!
Fast forward a few months and Gary was out of hospital in autumn 2005 and on regular tablets which seemed to do the trick ie the cough was gone and he looked bright'n'healthy again and full of life..the hospital monitored him on a regular basis and reported no problems regarding the growth getting larger or changing...indeed it became smaller. Christmas came and went with a brand new year unfolding 2006 with life things kicking back in and we connected again with the social rock thingy like nothing had happened the previous summer. he continued going for regular checks firstly every 2 weeks..then a month ending up every 3 months so it all appeared good. The 'old' Gary was back and he seemed to display a renewed vigour for life which is usually the case after a cancer scare isnt it. The months rolled on and life was good again. he changed his diet of course and a cleaner lifestyle took form and I think he felt much the better for it. It almost became like a fading memory the events of over a year ago and healthwise everything seemed fine..psychologically everything moved forward and negative thoughts slowly but surely disappeared. suddenly it was almost Christmas 2006..what happened to this past year? its slipped by so fast..cant believe its almost 2007.
It was a cold grueling winter this one and the usual Christmasy things came and went...we battoned down the hatches until the first hint of spring showed its face and then it was time for planning again ie the social calender and holidays etc etc like furry animals emerging from a long winters hibernation rubbing your eyes and eager to get stuck back into living normally again. Sunny March arrived 2007 and it was beautiful..we hit the gig circuit running and our motors were running again...our foots hit the floor and you could hear our engines roar! Gary had met a woman the past month and he liked her a lot. he revealed his feelings to me I guess looking for advice of some kind. I told him that having a love in ones life makes it all complete and even more enjoyable..that a close friendship between mates shouldnt suffer because of it...that if she felt the same toward him then he should invest more of himself into the bludgeoning relationship and see where it flows? he took my advice and offered her more of his social time which I understood so stepped back a little to allow it to grow. a routine emerged where we saw less of one another in favor of his growing love/needs from this woman. instead of the normal 3-4 times per week we used to meet up it dropped to once a week and sometimes less. I accepted that without question..it was early days and new love is all consuming..I understand that.
Something strange happened in mid April 2007 myself and Gary had a silly disagreement over the phone which rarely happened ever but both being strong characters I guess when it does happen its strong. it developed into a heated argument and slamming the phone down in frustration. neither would compromise or give any ground to get beyond it...which was silly and just male pride. I couldnt fathom who started it or fed it to heated proportions? I guess we were both to blame? I thought to myself well sod him..he has his woman now so isnt too bothered with me. it'll blow over in a short time and things will be fine again...lets just have some space between us. April turned into May and the weather was so fine with bright sunshine and the smell of spring hung in the air..that flower scented smell that makes you fell quite heady. I continued going to gigs locally and fully expected to bump into Gary and his woman..thinking we would and that silly disagreement would be forgotten about immediately...but we didnt. I didnt really think it was odd...just thought we were like passing ships in the night and would eventually. a few busy weeks with work my end and I didnt go out one weekend feeling a little exhausted. I almost phoned my friend Gary one evening thinking this was silly as I had missed our regular phone chats and meets.
I received a phone call from another friend on the 29th May whom I hadnt heard from in a while..."Hi I said" "wondered how you were these days"...he sounded sombre and said he was sorry but he was the bringer of bad news! He went on to say he knew myself and Gary had had a falling out a while back so thought it was only right he should inform me of recent events etc..oh god I thought whats happened? his words came out slowly and resonated in my head..."I dont think you knew that Gary was taken into hospital almost a month ago and remains there..that the hospital has told his relatives he wont be leaving and that sadly things arent good...that the cancer he had signs of 2 years previously had re-emerged quickly and unfortunately spread via his blood to his stomach".....oh my god! his words seemed to freeze in my head and numbed my thinking. I couldnt fully take in their meaning? I mean only weeks ago we were together and he was so full of life and healthy etc how could this happen so quickly? why didnt the hospital pick up on it and have some warning? a hundred questions flowed through my mind.
My friend on the phone went on to explain the sequence of events the past 5-6 weeks..apparent Gary had a heavy night of drinking one night while out and brought a curry on the way home..having eaten this he became sick shorty afterwards and brought the meal up. he put it down to being drunk. next few days he couldnt hold his food down for long and developed a feeling of indigestion in his tummy. he thought nothing of it and took pills from the chemist. but much like his persistent cough of a few years ago it wouldnt go away. his feeling of indigestion got steadily worse causing him to phone his doctor as 4 days. he told him to report immediately to the hospital outpatient dept which he did. they took an x-ray and blood test telling him he has to stay in over night as something doesnt look right. They discovered the cancerous growth on his lung to be still there but very small with little change but there were now small growths in the lining of his stomach and it had spread so much it was inoperable...even contemplating removing his whole stomach would not be enough as evidence was seen to show it had spread beyond that.
Gary was given emergency chemotherapy over the next few weeks in a vain attempt to stop the spread and limit the harm and he increasingly needed Morphine to kill the pain. he couldnt hold food down so had to be fed liquids via a tube. his weight loss was fast and his skin color faded but he remained upbeat even after the specialists slowly broke the news to him there was little hope...that he had to prepare himself for the worst. he had friends and family visit him...he listened to his beloved rock music on the bedside radio till the end and the nurse said his music seemed to give him strength. he became painfully thin and needed larger doses of Morphine..his mood slowly sunk toward the end and he became short tempered etc etc I listened to this account on the phone in a state of semi-shock! stunned both by the bad news but also as to why hadnt he contacted me his friend of old to tell me? was he just too stubborn? did he feel betrayed by me some how? was he embarrassed to tell me there was no hope? was he so doped up he couldnt think straight? so many painful questions that mashed my thinking up.
After this shocking phone call/news I immediately phoned the hospitable wanting to arrange a visit. it was late and the night staff were on duty they could tell me very little and suggested I call first thing in the morning. I gave in trying at that late hour and couldnt sleep that night. next morning I phoned the hospital first thing at 8am and had difficulty getting through to the right dept/ward..eventually after being passed onto 3 different staff members a female voice calmly told me that Gary had sadly passed on late last night. that he was calm and sedated with no pain. his younger brother and two other friends were at his bedside so he didnt die alone.....I couldnt believe what I was hearing! She told me that he was listening to his radio at that moment to his favorite rock station..he leaned forward slowly toward his brother and asked him in a hushed voice to hold his hand tightly and he quietly slipped away...tears filled my eyes uncontrollably.
11 days later on another beautifully sunny day mid week Garys funeral took place at the crematorium . I heard he had wanted to be buried but the current laws prevented it because his cancer was a form of toxic asbestosis and only cremation was possible..this had upset him apparently. it was a good turn out..lots of family/friends and aqquaintences..lots of summer flowers. The service was nice and they played 2 of Garys chosen rock tracks over the PA system which broke my heart and I couldnt hold back my emotions at that point...memories flooded my head and I couldnt relate to this whole thing...the music playing in this moment is associated with laughter happiness and our old times together as mates at gigs etc certainly not watching his coffin sliding behind curtains before the hot ovens...its just not real!
Over the next few days I contacted the local radio station and the DJ friend of Gary whom he had be-friended at various gigs agreed with his producers to do a radio tribute to a lost rocker and friend. he played the track from Aerosmith that Gary had been listening to at the moment of passing...so very moving..more tears. I recorded this radio tribute and burned it onto a dvd containing old photos/film of him I had taken over the years in a montage of his life. I handed these out to a few of his family/friends. How does one deal with a sudden loss of someone close? where do you find the answers to so many questions? grief is a lonely burdon to deal with. The rock scene is a lonelier place without you Gary..I miss your laughter...your jokes..I miss your views on life..I miss your spirit..I miss you beside me at gigs always with an opinion on the band...I loved you my friend and I miss you...you were only 52 and so full of life still...I recall what someone told me you said in defiance when you learned that there was little hope of recovery while laying in your hospital bed..you said.."oh well I've had a good 50 years plus..some folk dont get anywhere near that do they"....You may have gone in physical presence but your spirit lives beside me still at gigs and I gain a lot of inspiration from that...I will keep you alive in my thoughts which will be a fitting memorial to you...I lost a friend.... CALLEN
Sunday, 7 August 2011
The rhythm of time.....
There's an inner thing in every man,
Do you know this thing my friend?
It has withstood the blows of a million years,
And will do so to the end.
It was born when time did not exist,
And it grew up out of life,
It cut down evil's strangling vines,
Like a slashing searing knife.
It lit fires when fires were not,
And burnt the mind of man,
Tempering leandened hearts to steel,
From the time that time began.
It wept by the waters of Babylon,
And when all men were a loss,
It screeched in writhing agony,
And it hung bleeding from the Cross.
It died in Rome by lion and sword,
And in defiant cruel array,
When the deathly word was 'Spartacus'
Along with Appian Way.
It marched with Wat the Tyler's poor,
And frightened lord and king,
And it was emblazoned in their deathly stare,
As e'er a living thing.
It smiled in holy innocence,
Before conquistadors of old,
So meek and tame and unaware,
Of the deathly power of gold.
It burst forth through pitiful Paris streets,
And stormed the old Bastille,
And marched upon the serpent's head,
And crushed it 'neath its heel.
It died in blood on Buffalo Plains,
And starved by moons of rain,
Its heart was buried in Wounded Knee,
But it will come to rise again.
It screamed aloud by Kerry lakes,
As it was knelt upon the ground,
And it died in great defiance,
As they coldly shot it down.
It is found in every light of hope,
It knows no bounds nor space
It has risen in red and black and white,
It is there in every race.
It lies in the hearts of heroes dead,
It screams in tyrants' eyes,
It has reached the peak of mountains high,
It comes searing 'cross the skies.
It lights the dark of this prison cell,
It thunders forth its might,
It is 'the undauntable thought', my friend,
That thought that says 'I'm right!'
By 'BS'
Do you know this thing my friend?
It has withstood the blows of a million years,
And will do so to the end.
It was born when time did not exist,
And it grew up out of life,
It cut down evil's strangling vines,
Like a slashing searing knife.
It lit fires when fires were not,
And burnt the mind of man,
Tempering leandened hearts to steel,
From the time that time began.
It wept by the waters of Babylon,
And when all men were a loss,
It screeched in writhing agony,
And it hung bleeding from the Cross.
It died in Rome by lion and sword,
And in defiant cruel array,
When the deathly word was 'Spartacus'
Along with Appian Way.
It marched with Wat the Tyler's poor,
And frightened lord and king,
And it was emblazoned in their deathly stare,
As e'er a living thing.
It smiled in holy innocence,
Before conquistadors of old,
So meek and tame and unaware,
Of the deathly power of gold.
It burst forth through pitiful Paris streets,
And stormed the old Bastille,
And marched upon the serpent's head,
And crushed it 'neath its heel.
It died in blood on Buffalo Plains,
And starved by moons of rain,
Its heart was buried in Wounded Knee,
But it will come to rise again.
It screamed aloud by Kerry lakes,
As it was knelt upon the ground,
And it died in great defiance,
As they coldly shot it down.
It is found in every light of hope,
It knows no bounds nor space
It has risen in red and black and white,
It is there in every race.
It lies in the hearts of heroes dead,
It screams in tyrants' eyes,
It has reached the peak of mountains high,
It comes searing 'cross the skies.
It lights the dark of this prison cell,
It thunders forth its might,
It is 'the undauntable thought', my friend,
That thought that says 'I'm right!'
By 'BS'
Saturday, 25 June 2011
First day of Glastonbury 2011
As if by magic the rain clouds gathered above in preparation for the start of Glastonbury 2011. well its on the menu isnt it and and wellie manufacturers rely on it to boost their low summer trade. if you go and return home without Glastonbury dried mud on your boots you somehow feel cheated. but not for me I'm home 200 miles away in the relative comfort of my home settling down in front of my High Definition telly with beer in one hand and a reefer in the other [oh echoes of the old Glastonbury days haha] with my feet up on the puffy I'm definitly feeling in old Hippy mode...peace man!...Turn on tune in drop out!...My spirit is free an my heart is passionate! etc etc so.....I settle back feeling pretty laidback and in anticipation of some musical highs and nostalgia flashbacks.
I sat through over 4 hours of BBC broadcast Glastonbury and the long anticipated appearance of U2 who the festival has been trying to book since the 1980s. you will recall when they finally achieved this last year in 2010 lead singer Bono hurt his back and the whole shabang was cancelled so....finally they would appear and set the place alight! hmm...the trouble with anticipation and building something up in your mind is we tend to over anticipate and expectations are exaggerated to a degree with the result that it just doesnt live upto the headfit. sadly the rain clouds opened up almost on quo as a bad omen and it poured down. but the enthusiasm of the audience which numbered tens of thousands didnt appear dampened at it...indeed you could feel the atmospheric High from the crowd...oh this is going to be good I thought as I sat in my comfy armchair semi drunk'n'stoned..I had a silly smile across my face and felt like I was there pushing an shoving in that heaving happy sea of people oblivious to the pouring rain and sticky mud...I mean its the best rock band in the world U2! hmm well..we all get swept up in the moment dont we even ole hippies like me haha.
anyhow the moment arrived and suddenly the band appeared on stage to a cresendo of applause'n'cheer..hey! The first choice of track wasnt a grabber like you'd expect from this band because they usually like to grab you by the balls early and hold you there for 2 hours but....the opener didnt achieve that. I started to notice things like the band members didnt display much spirit or enthusiasm...maybe it was the pouring rain? I mean multi-millionaire Rock gods are used to the best creature comforts and conditions..or maybe the were a bit nervous because of the big build up to appearing at this iconic festival for the first time? whatever they appeared to me to be dragging their feet a bit. another thing that struck me to was Bono..he looked old tonite. his forehead looked wrinkled and his face frowns deeper..ok these guys are now in their mid 40s but that isnt really old. he also looked a little overweight and moved in a wooden fashion...not the usual sprightly spirited Bono who normally steals the stage and grabs your eye etc no....for whatever reason it didnt all 'fit' tonite and I felt a little disappointed after about 20 mins. dont get me wrong there were emotional and exciting moments yes during the set but...it had patches of lacklustre. The crowd were screaming and cheering all the way but I've come to notice the new generation of Glasto-ites will scream'n'wave at anything put in front of them..I mean the TV cameras are there and mummy'n'daddy are watching at home so....yes a good show by the band but.....you dont want 'buts'
After the show you had the usual interview in the BBC tent festooned with plastic flowers and tacky Hippy type memoribelia like something out of a Clacton tourist shop. but even then the band members seemed out of sorts and unrelaxed. Bono came out with his usual crap about saving the millions of poor and the mystic aura of Glastonbury etc etc oh lord please listen to yourself at times man! so over all I felt a bit cheated and deflated...certainly not spiritually lifted by the music like I expected. I started to wonder did I have a bad batch of dope or crap supermarket beer? did I miss the vibe somewhere? am I tired or just too old for this?? no I dont think so. To put my cynical hat on this festival simply isnt living up to my memory of old. can you remember the original hippy festival of Glastonbury and the inspiration of those early Hippies who created it? it actually meant something special back then and was a show piece of the alternative society we were trying to create way from Straight society..it was a weekend vision of our new world that we dreamed of albeit in a youthful naive way. but it doesnt matter because you can always gleen the good bits from any dream. The event I was watching tonite didnt resemble that dream of old but a new model...like a car altered for trend/fashion purposes but was ruined in the process..or a remake of an old classic film that comes out ok but diluted in content and quality.
Glastonbury is still a good thing for its creation of community and fun...for the music and of course for business and jobs. thats the essence of it really today. its not spiritual but a corporate summer event..like an exaggerated village fete on the village green. a summer camp for middle class kids pretending to be hippies for the weekend with their designer multi-colored wellies and fake tans. its a meeting place for eccentrics and perceived multi-culturalism. for family outings and people to dress up in funny costumes and ape to the ever present TV cameras...a place for kids to escape their parents for a long weekend and be wild..its a like a Butlins summer camp for teens etc etc ok its good in one sense but devoid of the original concept. its simply now a corporate event and empty of meaning.
Even the usual BBC TV presenters came across as a little stale and just going through the motions...certainly no youthful enthusiasm from boring middle aged MILF DJ Jo Wiley with her posh accent and silly designer ripped jeans at the knee..oh lord thats become so crass and expected. is she trying to say I'm hip and rock'n'roll? it simply doesnt work Jo....you look past your sell by date. Then theres Mark Lamarr another radio 2 DJ and TV presenter who looks 15 years older then his 44 years. he presents himself tonite unshaven with a greying mess of stubble and hippy farmer hat and overcoat looking more like an extra in a Benny hill sketch...trying to portray a Hippy of old and not succeeding in fact he was born in that famous counter-culture year of 1967...summer of Love and flower power remember?...well I do anyway. sorry Mark it didnt work you looked a prat to my eyes. There was also that Aussie sound presenter Zac? not sure what he does or where he comes from? but he talks too much and tries to over emphasis his musical knowledge which irritates..over all a poor performance from the BBC presenters too.
On a serious note....There were a group of young protesters in the audience who had planned in advance and with the permission of the festival organisers to protest against U2's recent decision to shift their business organisation out of Eire their home country to avoid paying their tax rate. you've got to understand here that Ireland are currently suffering their 2nd worst recession in history and are in financial dire straits. U2 earned £120 million plus last year from various sales/tours and are estimated to be worth jointly £800 million so vastly rich beyond most peoples dreams yet they choose to leave their ailing country at its worst point to avoid the tax....all this and lead singer Bono makes a huge point of caring about his country and the under priviliged of the world etc etc how two faced is this!? Stay and pay your taxes U2..help your country when in need! I was disappointed when this young protest group with their planned demonstration to bring the tax issue to our attention were not allowed to be on camera. indeed as soon as they inflated their 20 foot balloon with words printed across it ' U need to pay your taxes 2' they had thuggish security guards jump on them and bundle them away...how un-Glastonbury in spirit.
After 4 hours slouching in my chair I felt totally drained of emotion and a little empty....deflated emotionally I mean instead of lifted. thankful that I wasnt there in the rain'n'mud like I wished I was 4 hours previously. Thumbs up to the festival and the thousands that still enjoy it but for me personally its a different animal that I dont recognise anymore....I'm off to bed to dream of days of old..oh it was such a special time back then...there was a magic in the air in Glastonbury 1970s model...a feeling of Camelot....isnt that what dreams are made of? CALLEN
Words of Wisdom...." The only things in life you will regret.....are the risks you didnt take "
I sat through over 4 hours of BBC broadcast Glastonbury and the long anticipated appearance of U2 who the festival has been trying to book since the 1980s. you will recall when they finally achieved this last year in 2010 lead singer Bono hurt his back and the whole shabang was cancelled so....finally they would appear and set the place alight! hmm...the trouble with anticipation and building something up in your mind is we tend to over anticipate and expectations are exaggerated to a degree with the result that it just doesnt live upto the headfit. sadly the rain clouds opened up almost on quo as a bad omen and it poured down. but the enthusiasm of the audience which numbered tens of thousands didnt appear dampened at it...indeed you could feel the atmospheric High from the crowd...oh this is going to be good I thought as I sat in my comfy armchair semi drunk'n'stoned..I had a silly smile across my face and felt like I was there pushing an shoving in that heaving happy sea of people oblivious to the pouring rain and sticky mud...I mean its the best rock band in the world U2! hmm well..we all get swept up in the moment dont we even ole hippies like me haha.
anyhow the moment arrived and suddenly the band appeared on stage to a cresendo of applause'n'cheer..hey! The first choice of track wasnt a grabber like you'd expect from this band because they usually like to grab you by the balls early and hold you there for 2 hours but....the opener didnt achieve that. I started to notice things like the band members didnt display much spirit or enthusiasm...maybe it was the pouring rain? I mean multi-millionaire Rock gods are used to the best creature comforts and conditions..or maybe the were a bit nervous because of the big build up to appearing at this iconic festival for the first time? whatever they appeared to me to be dragging their feet a bit. another thing that struck me to was Bono..he looked old tonite. his forehead looked wrinkled and his face frowns deeper..ok these guys are now in their mid 40s but that isnt really old. he also looked a little overweight and moved in a wooden fashion...not the usual sprightly spirited Bono who normally steals the stage and grabs your eye etc no....for whatever reason it didnt all 'fit' tonite and I felt a little disappointed after about 20 mins. dont get me wrong there were emotional and exciting moments yes during the set but...it had patches of lacklustre. The crowd were screaming and cheering all the way but I've come to notice the new generation of Glasto-ites will scream'n'wave at anything put in front of them..I mean the TV cameras are there and mummy'n'daddy are watching at home so....yes a good show by the band but.....you dont want 'buts'
After the show you had the usual interview in the BBC tent festooned with plastic flowers and tacky Hippy type memoribelia like something out of a Clacton tourist shop. but even then the band members seemed out of sorts and unrelaxed. Bono came out with his usual crap about saving the millions of poor and the mystic aura of Glastonbury etc etc oh lord please listen to yourself at times man! so over all I felt a bit cheated and deflated...certainly not spiritually lifted by the music like I expected. I started to wonder did I have a bad batch of dope or crap supermarket beer? did I miss the vibe somewhere? am I tired or just too old for this?? no I dont think so. To put my cynical hat on this festival simply isnt living up to my memory of old. can you remember the original hippy festival of Glastonbury and the inspiration of those early Hippies who created it? it actually meant something special back then and was a show piece of the alternative society we were trying to create way from Straight society..it was a weekend vision of our new world that we dreamed of albeit in a youthful naive way. but it doesnt matter because you can always gleen the good bits from any dream. The event I was watching tonite didnt resemble that dream of old but a new model...like a car altered for trend/fashion purposes but was ruined in the process..or a remake of an old classic film that comes out ok but diluted in content and quality.
Glastonbury is still a good thing for its creation of community and fun...for the music and of course for business and jobs. thats the essence of it really today. its not spiritual but a corporate summer event..like an exaggerated village fete on the village green. a summer camp for middle class kids pretending to be hippies for the weekend with their designer multi-colored wellies and fake tans. its a meeting place for eccentrics and perceived multi-culturalism. for family outings and people to dress up in funny costumes and ape to the ever present TV cameras...a place for kids to escape their parents for a long weekend and be wild..its a like a Butlins summer camp for teens etc etc ok its good in one sense but devoid of the original concept. its simply now a corporate event and empty of meaning.
Even the usual BBC TV presenters came across as a little stale and just going through the motions...certainly no youthful enthusiasm from boring middle aged MILF DJ Jo Wiley with her posh accent and silly designer ripped jeans at the knee..oh lord thats become so crass and expected. is she trying to say I'm hip and rock'n'roll? it simply doesnt work Jo....you look past your sell by date. Then theres Mark Lamarr another radio 2 DJ and TV presenter who looks 15 years older then his 44 years. he presents himself tonite unshaven with a greying mess of stubble and hippy farmer hat and overcoat looking more like an extra in a Benny hill sketch...trying to portray a Hippy of old and not succeeding in fact he was born in that famous counter-culture year of 1967...summer of Love and flower power remember?...well I do anyway. sorry Mark it didnt work you looked a prat to my eyes. There was also that Aussie sound presenter Zac? not sure what he does or where he comes from? but he talks too much and tries to over emphasis his musical knowledge which irritates..over all a poor performance from the BBC presenters too.
On a serious note....There were a group of young protesters in the audience who had planned in advance and with the permission of the festival organisers to protest against U2's recent decision to shift their business organisation out of Eire their home country to avoid paying their tax rate. you've got to understand here that Ireland are currently suffering their 2nd worst recession in history and are in financial dire straits. U2 earned £120 million plus last year from various sales/tours and are estimated to be worth jointly £800 million so vastly rich beyond most peoples dreams yet they choose to leave their ailing country at its worst point to avoid the tax....all this and lead singer Bono makes a huge point of caring about his country and the under priviliged of the world etc etc how two faced is this!? Stay and pay your taxes U2..help your country when in need! I was disappointed when this young protest group with their planned demonstration to bring the tax issue to our attention were not allowed to be on camera. indeed as soon as they inflated their 20 foot balloon with words printed across it ' U need to pay your taxes 2' they had thuggish security guards jump on them and bundle them away...how un-Glastonbury in spirit.
After 4 hours slouching in my chair I felt totally drained of emotion and a little empty....deflated emotionally I mean instead of lifted. thankful that I wasnt there in the rain'n'mud like I wished I was 4 hours previously. Thumbs up to the festival and the thousands that still enjoy it but for me personally its a different animal that I dont recognise anymore....I'm off to bed to dream of days of old..oh it was such a special time back then...there was a magic in the air in Glastonbury 1970s model...a feeling of Camelot....isnt that what dreams are made of? CALLEN
Words of Wisdom...." The only things in life you will regret.....are the risks you didnt take "
Tuesday, 17 May 2011
This Timeless Place
THIS TIMELESS PLACE
Diamonds on the velvet
Starlight in the black
A valley steeped in history
Far from the beaten track
Strawberries in the water
Crystals on the sea
This timeless place of mystery
This secret I can see
I come here to slay my demons
Heaven's eyes will stare them down
Now I know the magic of believing
Now I hear the beauty of no sound
In a place where witches gather
In a grave of shipwrecked souls
I found a taste that I can savour
And I turned off life's controls
In the warm Atlantic sunlight
In the wild and sea green air
Did I try to touch the moonlight
This timeless place can take me there
This timeless place that we can share
An ocean like a mirror
But a stranger in the glass
A mouth that's always welcome
Swallows my dreams at last
A wind that seems to whisper
Blows a cyclone in my mind
And when you are like a hurricane
All my thoughts can then unwind
I didn't come to find redemption
But it came and found me here
I can see but almost blind myself
When that starlit sky's so clear
I saw the place where witches guard us
I saw the mariners of Arbroath
The world marches on regardless
But now I'm haunted by their ghosts
In the warm Atlantic sunlight
In the wild and deep blue sky
For the love of gold and moonlight
This timeless place won't pass you by
This timeless place won't let you die
She watches beauty through my eyes
She reads the words that I would write
And she knows there is no curse
The sights and thoughts were always hers
She saw the ghosts of sailors in my mind
She smelt their death within my sight
And she knows that they are at peace
She knows their souls have found release
Sailors on the turquoise
Widows wrapped in black
A witch that's never vanquished
And death wears its usual mac
She smiled and kissed a mariner
An Arbroath smokie who might steam
He bucked and kicked like a stallion
In a wet and deathly dream
In a place where witches gather
Near where those sailors died
My god! I've dreamed of changes
That spells and sails now sanctify
This timeless place in the Atlantic
This ocean wave and wild blue wind
This timeless place is so romantic
This timeless place where love begins
And those mariners of Arbroath
Seem to listen through the years
I can almost hear them swear that oath
I can almost hear them crying tears
In a place where witches gather
A timeless place where sailors lie
Their sight is blind to changes
But our night's eyes cannot comply
In the bright stars of the Atlantic
I fell again in love with life
This timeless place is so romantic
This timeless place
This timeless place
This timeless place
This timeless place within my sight
Words of Wisdom........" The point of living and of being an optimist is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come"
Diamonds on the velvet
Starlight in the black
A valley steeped in history
Far from the beaten track
Strawberries in the water
Crystals on the sea
This timeless place of mystery
This secret I can see
I come here to slay my demons
Heaven's eyes will stare them down
Now I know the magic of believing
Now I hear the beauty of no sound
In a place where witches gather
In a grave of shipwrecked souls
I found a taste that I can savour
And I turned off life's controls
In the warm Atlantic sunlight
In the wild and sea green air
Did I try to touch the moonlight
This timeless place can take me there
This timeless place that we can share
An ocean like a mirror
But a stranger in the glass
A mouth that's always welcome
Swallows my dreams at last
A wind that seems to whisper
Blows a cyclone in my mind
And when you are like a hurricane
All my thoughts can then unwind
I didn't come to find redemption
But it came and found me here
I can see but almost blind myself
When that starlit sky's so clear
I saw the place where witches guard us
I saw the mariners of Arbroath
The world marches on regardless
But now I'm haunted by their ghosts
In the warm Atlantic sunlight
In the wild and deep blue sky
For the love of gold and moonlight
This timeless place won't pass you by
This timeless place won't let you die
She watches beauty through my eyes
She reads the words that I would write
And she knows there is no curse
The sights and thoughts were always hers
She saw the ghosts of sailors in my mind
She smelt their death within my sight
And she knows that they are at peace
She knows their souls have found release
Sailors on the turquoise
Widows wrapped in black
A witch that's never vanquished
And death wears its usual mac
She smiled and kissed a mariner
An Arbroath smokie who might steam
He bucked and kicked like a stallion
In a wet and deathly dream
In a place where witches gather
Near where those sailors died
My god! I've dreamed of changes
That spells and sails now sanctify
This timeless place in the Atlantic
This ocean wave and wild blue wind
This timeless place is so romantic
This timeless place where love begins
And those mariners of Arbroath
Seem to listen through the years
I can almost hear them swear that oath
I can almost hear them crying tears
In a place where witches gather
A timeless place where sailors lie
Their sight is blind to changes
But our night's eyes cannot comply
In the bright stars of the Atlantic
I fell again in love with life
This timeless place is so romantic
This timeless place
This timeless place
This timeless place
This timeless place within my sight
Words of Wisdom........" The point of living and of being an optimist is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come"
Monday, 2 May 2011
Get me to the church on time...The Royal Wedding 29th April 2011
Well the widely promoted Royal event finally arrived and passed with military precision unsurprisingly as it was their stage managed show. A huge technicolor extravaganza that lit up tv screens the world over. In modern media terms it was a cross between a tv soap opera and reality show with a sprinkling of Romance straight out of a Jane Austin novel. Pomp and pageantry in bucket loads and brightly colored camp uniforms and shiny swords that you might expect from a West end Theatre production of "Oh What A Lovely War". It was all there filling the Plasma screens in glorious 3D color. To me it was like one of those cosy sunday afternoon films on the telly where you slip your shoes off..knees up on the sofa...pour a glass of wine..darken the room and settle down cosily to watch a nostalgic old film of yesteryear for pure escapism. indeed thats what the whole spectacle was designed for to distract joe public away from todays serious world events.
Sitting there watching it all unfold on the screen it was so easy to slip into a trance like state of National pride and nostalgia....indeed I did for a while but it wasnt because I am woolly headed over the monarchy or believed in fairytails..no it was because I'm big on History and value some elements of Tradition even relating to past monarchy but I state here very clearly I'm not a Royalist...nor an I woolly headed over such things. I am a Realist and my head in stuck firmly in the 21st Century where it so belongs..its a pity more of the Mall flag wavers arent the same. I must stress here I'm not a moany ole spoilsport either The Royal family today are an oddity and in reality are little more then a Tourist attraction for foreign visitors of which the British economy relies upon because they flock here in their millions to view old Britain. Many Royal supporters will argue that they are a figurehead or brand label of this country and promote world trade because of the image of political stability they portray..I think there is some worth in this view but its hard to prove.
To me the Royal family represents Elitism and the class system in this country that has dogged us for generations. certainly oppressing the lower classes denying them opportunities and social standing. denying them political freedoms and advancement in many areas. The Royals also represent Empire which no longer exists and we all know past Empire ambitions oppressed other cultures in the world and invented Negro slavery. not to mention sowing the seeds of many of the world conflicts/wars we are experiencing today. Empire was good for an elitist few in the past but didnt give much to the lower classes. I argue that Empire should be assigned to the history books as a negative thing and not celebrated like it was at the Royal wedding. The Royals have no real political power in todays Britain and hardly influences Parliament..remember Parliament and Democracy only exists because of rebellion and civil war in this country thanks to Cromwell and his rebels. To re-instate the Monarchy after creating Parliament was a big mistake in my view. Like I said they are a modern oddity in todays world and represent very little.
I havent mentioned the happy couple whose day it was after all. I personally think they are both rather nice and appear reasonably down to earth [well the media have painted this picture]..indeed its hard not to like them and I sincerely wish them well. I just hope sweet Kate is fully aware [unlike Diana before her] what shes letting herself in for? being a Commoner she didnt have Posh Dianas training in the Aristocratic world she came from. Many will think the wearing of Dianas ring was a nice touch but it rings differently to me....its well written the royals view women as mere fillys there for breeding future kings as inbreeding is important to them and its well documented that after Princess Diana spouted a few male baby heirs she was more or less disgarded by the inner circle..even bonny Prince charlie chose to spend his private and intimate time with his mistress Camilla rather then his Princess wife. Theres that famous moment captured on film of newly engaged Charles and Diana speaking to the tv news camera when he was asked if he was in love?...his somber reply was " I'm not sure what love is"...she was there as a mere filly for breeding. lets hope sweet Kate doesnt suffer the same fate a few years down the line but I think shes safe until she sprouts male heirs dont you?
One of my biggest beefs on the wedding extravaganza is of course the cost. We must all be aware that we are currently suffering the worst recession since the 2nd world war and everyone in this island country is suffering as a result of cowboy bankers who were unregulated by government and of course semi corrupt government members toboot. Make no mistake we are in a very bad way out in the real world away from the fairytail wedding images. Out on the street our public services are being drastically cut and we havent seen the results of that yet. In our hospitals the cuts are savage as frontline nursing staff are being sacked and doctors are being forced out. Not to mention our current government are slowly selling off our precious NHS to the private sector. patient care is suffering and people are dying literally because of those cuts. in our schools teachers are not being employed for lack of money and classes are increasingly being run by teaching assistants which is scarey as the education of our children is vital. Our armed forces are being diluted to a frightening level with sackings right across the 3 forces and equipment being scrapped..yet the crazy thing is our corrupt government is getting us involved in new war conflicts that have nothing to do with us the latest being Liberia. its easy to forget our involvement in old wars in Afghanistan/Irag are costing this country many £millions each day.
add to this our arts budgets are being cut..our Libraries..our Charity organisations are going under...our industries are failing through lack of investments etc etc all this madness happening yet the fairytale Royal wedding is being funded via the already empty public purse. its estimated the wedding pomp itself has cost up to £100million and add to that the public holiday with lost industrial production of which our failing economy desperately needs will amount to almost £3-4 billion. Its really quite hard to take in the end costs and what reward does such expenditure bring? a few days of unity and public happiness/escapism? We are talking about one of the richest families in the world here with their £billion plus fortune and their riches increase every year because of the Royals investment and property/land ownership. I am outraged that we the suffering public had to finance this over the top display of elitism and class...if the Royals wanted to set an example and show they understand our current suffering in this country why didnt they finance this wedding? we're all in it together arent we?
I am of course aware the Royals give a lot of pleasure to millions of ordinary folk. I am not advocating here lining them up against the wall and shooting the lot of them..although it may not be a bad thing for our future. I would be happy to see them remain for the few positive reasons I mentioned somewhere above but..let the flag waving royalists agree to fund them by paying maybe an extra 50p tax per week and those who dont want them which numbers millions as well opt out of having their taxes taken without choice..thats fair and Democratic isnt it? I do understand why ordinary folk love them so much. The Royals represent a past age and values which are now lost in this country thanks to corrupt government policies that have dilluted the essence of this nation over the past 5 decades. People hark back to a time of morale standards and social community with institutions in place that bound us together etc those things are gone now and people wrongly think the Royals that represent a bygone age can bring that back...its misguided thinking in my view. if the British public can only get together in community during Royal events then we are in serious trouble...The fairytale Wedding does not reflect reality I'm afraid its as real as a tv soap. In the real world we live in streets where neighbours dont know one another and make no effort to do so. we have allowed ourselves to slip into an Orwellian Big Brother police state out there...the fairytale isnt true!
Indeed the Orwellian feared State did show its ugly face prior to the wedding event when big brother police raided umpteen addresses both in london and outside arresting innocent people on trumped up charges that they were suspected of plotting to disrupt the Royal event. including 3 London squats where whole families were thrown in jail cells for 3 days without charge..only on suspicion of pre-crimes. that is surely reminiscent of past Royal behavior ie throw them in the tower. Even the registered and legitimate protest groups had their freedom of speech taken away from them for 3 days so thats Royal Democracy in action..its not a fairytale vision I want to be part of....my Royal flag has no wind in its sail..god save the Queen! CALLEN
Words of Wisdom..... "To get to the end of the rainbow...you have to put up with the rain"
Sitting there watching it all unfold on the screen it was so easy to slip into a trance like state of National pride and nostalgia....indeed I did for a while but it wasnt because I am woolly headed over the monarchy or believed in fairytails..no it was because I'm big on History and value some elements of Tradition even relating to past monarchy but I state here very clearly I'm not a Royalist...nor an I woolly headed over such things. I am a Realist and my head in stuck firmly in the 21st Century where it so belongs..its a pity more of the Mall flag wavers arent the same. I must stress here I'm not a moany ole spoilsport either The Royal family today are an oddity and in reality are little more then a Tourist attraction for foreign visitors of which the British economy relies upon because they flock here in their millions to view old Britain. Many Royal supporters will argue that they are a figurehead or brand label of this country and promote world trade because of the image of political stability they portray..I think there is some worth in this view but its hard to prove.
To me the Royal family represents Elitism and the class system in this country that has dogged us for generations. certainly oppressing the lower classes denying them opportunities and social standing. denying them political freedoms and advancement in many areas. The Royals also represent Empire which no longer exists and we all know past Empire ambitions oppressed other cultures in the world and invented Negro slavery. not to mention sowing the seeds of many of the world conflicts/wars we are experiencing today. Empire was good for an elitist few in the past but didnt give much to the lower classes. I argue that Empire should be assigned to the history books as a negative thing and not celebrated like it was at the Royal wedding. The Royals have no real political power in todays Britain and hardly influences Parliament..remember Parliament and Democracy only exists because of rebellion and civil war in this country thanks to Cromwell and his rebels. To re-instate the Monarchy after creating Parliament was a big mistake in my view. Like I said they are a modern oddity in todays world and represent very little.
I havent mentioned the happy couple whose day it was after all. I personally think they are both rather nice and appear reasonably down to earth [well the media have painted this picture]..indeed its hard not to like them and I sincerely wish them well. I just hope sweet Kate is fully aware [unlike Diana before her] what shes letting herself in for? being a Commoner she didnt have Posh Dianas training in the Aristocratic world she came from. Many will think the wearing of Dianas ring was a nice touch but it rings differently to me....its well written the royals view women as mere fillys there for breeding future kings as inbreeding is important to them and its well documented that after Princess Diana spouted a few male baby heirs she was more or less disgarded by the inner circle..even bonny Prince charlie chose to spend his private and intimate time with his mistress Camilla rather then his Princess wife. Theres that famous moment captured on film of newly engaged Charles and Diana speaking to the tv news camera when he was asked if he was in love?...his somber reply was " I'm not sure what love is"...she was there as a mere filly for breeding. lets hope sweet Kate doesnt suffer the same fate a few years down the line but I think shes safe until she sprouts male heirs dont you?
One of my biggest beefs on the wedding extravaganza is of course the cost. We must all be aware that we are currently suffering the worst recession since the 2nd world war and everyone in this island country is suffering as a result of cowboy bankers who were unregulated by government and of course semi corrupt government members toboot. Make no mistake we are in a very bad way out in the real world away from the fairytail wedding images. Out on the street our public services are being drastically cut and we havent seen the results of that yet. In our hospitals the cuts are savage as frontline nursing staff are being sacked and doctors are being forced out. Not to mention our current government are slowly selling off our precious NHS to the private sector. patient care is suffering and people are dying literally because of those cuts. in our schools teachers are not being employed for lack of money and classes are increasingly being run by teaching assistants which is scarey as the education of our children is vital. Our armed forces are being diluted to a frightening level with sackings right across the 3 forces and equipment being scrapped..yet the crazy thing is our corrupt government is getting us involved in new war conflicts that have nothing to do with us the latest being Liberia. its easy to forget our involvement in old wars in Afghanistan/Irag are costing this country many £millions each day.
add to this our arts budgets are being cut..our Libraries..our Charity organisations are going under...our industries are failing through lack of investments etc etc all this madness happening yet the fairytale Royal wedding is being funded via the already empty public purse. its estimated the wedding pomp itself has cost up to £100million and add to that the public holiday with lost industrial production of which our failing economy desperately needs will amount to almost £3-4 billion. Its really quite hard to take in the end costs and what reward does such expenditure bring? a few days of unity and public happiness/escapism? We are talking about one of the richest families in the world here with their £billion plus fortune and their riches increase every year because of the Royals investment and property/land ownership. I am outraged that we the suffering public had to finance this over the top display of elitism and class...if the Royals wanted to set an example and show they understand our current suffering in this country why didnt they finance this wedding? we're all in it together arent we?
I am of course aware the Royals give a lot of pleasure to millions of ordinary folk. I am not advocating here lining them up against the wall and shooting the lot of them..although it may not be a bad thing for our future. I would be happy to see them remain for the few positive reasons I mentioned somewhere above but..let the flag waving royalists agree to fund them by paying maybe an extra 50p tax per week and those who dont want them which numbers millions as well opt out of having their taxes taken without choice..thats fair and Democratic isnt it? I do understand why ordinary folk love them so much. The Royals represent a past age and values which are now lost in this country thanks to corrupt government policies that have dilluted the essence of this nation over the past 5 decades. People hark back to a time of morale standards and social community with institutions in place that bound us together etc those things are gone now and people wrongly think the Royals that represent a bygone age can bring that back...its misguided thinking in my view. if the British public can only get together in community during Royal events then we are in serious trouble...The fairytale Wedding does not reflect reality I'm afraid its as real as a tv soap. In the real world we live in streets where neighbours dont know one another and make no effort to do so. we have allowed ourselves to slip into an Orwellian Big Brother police state out there...the fairytale isnt true!
Indeed the Orwellian feared State did show its ugly face prior to the wedding event when big brother police raided umpteen addresses both in london and outside arresting innocent people on trumped up charges that they were suspected of plotting to disrupt the Royal event. including 3 London squats where whole families were thrown in jail cells for 3 days without charge..only on suspicion of pre-crimes. that is surely reminiscent of past Royal behavior ie throw them in the tower. Even the registered and legitimate protest groups had their freedom of speech taken away from them for 3 days so thats Royal Democracy in action..its not a fairytale vision I want to be part of....my Royal flag has no wind in its sail..god save the Queen! CALLEN
Words of Wisdom..... "To get to the end of the rainbow...you have to put up with the rain"
Wednesday, 16 March 2011
Wednesday, 9 March 2011
TURN TO STONE
" Have you ever felt the wind blow softly on your face "
when the stars hung like diamonds in the sky........
Have you ever tasted teardrops when your dreams have been erased
when the love you loved has turned and said "goodbye"
Have you ever seen the morning when its drawn upon the mountain
and the mist is like a blanket upon the sky........
Have you ever heard your own heart when its crying and shouting
at the one you loved who just turned and said "goodbye"
I didnt know but I guess we were strangers
now shes gone and I am left alone
Theres nothing left here but things to remember...
the way her heart has turned to stone
Have you ever seen a moment like the black of midnite
when you felt your life was over and you cried
Have you ever prayed to your maker when just living was too much
when the one you loved just turned and said "goodbye"
I didnt know but I guess we were strangers now shes gone
I am left here alone with nothing but things to remember
oh lord my heart has turned to stone.
Words of Wisdom......" To create art means putting ones head..ones eye..ones heart on the same axis "
when the stars hung like diamonds in the sky........
Have you ever tasted teardrops when your dreams have been erased
when the love you loved has turned and said "goodbye"
Have you ever seen the morning when its drawn upon the mountain
and the mist is like a blanket upon the sky........
Have you ever heard your own heart when its crying and shouting
at the one you loved who just turned and said "goodbye"
I didnt know but I guess we were strangers
now shes gone and I am left alone
Theres nothing left here but things to remember...
the way her heart has turned to stone
Have you ever seen a moment like the black of midnite
when you felt your life was over and you cried
Have you ever prayed to your maker when just living was too much
when the one you loved just turned and said "goodbye"
I didnt know but I guess we were strangers now shes gone
I am left here alone with nothing but things to remember
oh lord my heart has turned to stone.
Words of Wisdom......" To create art means putting ones head..ones eye..ones heart on the same axis "
Saturday, 1 January 2011
New beginning...New year...new opportunities....2011
So..how many new year resolutions you gonna make and probably end up breaking? People in western culture are so flighty and lacking in self disciplines. I ponder is it because we are without religious faith these days? or maybe because we are blinded by endless temptations? Is consumerism so unsatisfying that we crave more and more in a vain attempt to find something? until in the end we are totally lost spiritually and consumed ourselves!
Yes the end of an old year causes reflection and stock taking..unless of course you wanna stay on the same ole treadmill as last year. Its time to reflect quietly on the lost opportunities of last year and the mistakes we made with people. Trying not to repeat them. Like a beautiful king snake in the garden of Eden we should shred our old skins once a year and face the new year a new. we need to spiritually evolve and hopefully become better people..this crazy violent world needs that!
We need to stop and question the way we live. we are greedy and selfish..we are impulsive and reactionary..we are arrogant and narrow minded...its not our fault because we have been taught to behave that way. many travel through each year thinking the most important thing in life is...our own happiness! we want a better car..better/bigger house..the latest electronic gadget accessory..more exotic holidays..more better sex..wanna wanna wanna...so..where does it all end? what is the ultimate goal? A better world?
In the near future when there really is a 'Them and Us' society divided by extremes of wealth education and technical know how. Where the chosen minority live in security gated communities and the under classes live on massive cctv watched estates with their own shopping malls schools and social facilities. when sea levels have risen and we no longer have long hazy summers but hurricane storms are the norm. that western liberal religions have all but died out and the world faith is predominantly Islam. The oil has all but run out and we cant afford to purchase/run the new electronic cars and in any case we are restricted to 20 miles per week etc etc is this really a picture of the future?
Why not make a resolution to be more human from now on? to think of others less fortunate than ourselves..to be more tolerant to those that are different to us in race look philosophy culture. To have respect for our communities and the world we live in. To not follow false heroes like celebrities or consume without thought. To look beyond materialism because its all just glitter and not gold. when you are a nan or grandad in the future and your little grandchild looks up at you and innocently asks.." What did you do nan/grandad before the world changed? " Will you reply.." Oh I was too busy having a good time with my big house/fast cars/latest Ipod phone/cool fashions/binge drinking/casual multiply sex partners etc etc to even notice the changes in the world" Its a brand new year and if we try we do have the power to change things for the better.
When you walk out the door tomorrow make an effort...reach out with kindness to someone new for a change and break through that wall you have built around yourself...what wall you might say? are you sure there isnt one?. break free from your cosy social clique and connect with others. Its called caring and community...remember when we had that? Our societies have slipped into a surreal scenario where neighbours living on the same street or even housing block are strangers. Even elderly folk living in our midst can die and no one knows for weeks. its unreal. One of my new year Resolutions is to try and be a better person in 2011 and reach out. Are you going to make the effort?? CALLEN
Words of wisdom...." The road to hell is..paved with good intentions!"
Yes the end of an old year causes reflection and stock taking..unless of course you wanna stay on the same ole treadmill as last year. Its time to reflect quietly on the lost opportunities of last year and the mistakes we made with people. Trying not to repeat them. Like a beautiful king snake in the garden of Eden we should shred our old skins once a year and face the new year a new. we need to spiritually evolve and hopefully become better people..this crazy violent world needs that!
We need to stop and question the way we live. we are greedy and selfish..we are impulsive and reactionary..we are arrogant and narrow minded...its not our fault because we have been taught to behave that way. many travel through each year thinking the most important thing in life is...our own happiness! we want a better car..better/bigger house..the latest electronic gadget accessory..more exotic holidays..more better sex..wanna wanna wanna...so..where does it all end? what is the ultimate goal? A better world?
In the near future when there really is a 'Them and Us' society divided by extremes of wealth education and technical know how. Where the chosen minority live in security gated communities and the under classes live on massive cctv watched estates with their own shopping malls schools and social facilities. when sea levels have risen and we no longer have long hazy summers but hurricane storms are the norm. that western liberal religions have all but died out and the world faith is predominantly Islam. The oil has all but run out and we cant afford to purchase/run the new electronic cars and in any case we are restricted to 20 miles per week etc etc is this really a picture of the future?
Why not make a resolution to be more human from now on? to think of others less fortunate than ourselves..to be more tolerant to those that are different to us in race look philosophy culture. To have respect for our communities and the world we live in. To not follow false heroes like celebrities or consume without thought. To look beyond materialism because its all just glitter and not gold. when you are a nan or grandad in the future and your little grandchild looks up at you and innocently asks.." What did you do nan/grandad before the world changed? " Will you reply.." Oh I was too busy having a good time with my big house/fast cars/latest Ipod phone/cool fashions/binge drinking/casual multiply sex partners etc etc to even notice the changes in the world" Its a brand new year and if we try we do have the power to change things for the better.
When you walk out the door tomorrow make an effort...reach out with kindness to someone new for a change and break through that wall you have built around yourself...what wall you might say? are you sure there isnt one?. break free from your cosy social clique and connect with others. Its called caring and community...remember when we had that? Our societies have slipped into a surreal scenario where neighbours living on the same street or even housing block are strangers. Even elderly folk living in our midst can die and no one knows for weeks. its unreal. One of my new year Resolutions is to try and be a better person in 2011 and reach out. Are you going to make the effort?? CALLEN
Words of wisdom...." The road to hell is..paved with good intentions!"
Tuesday, 26 October 2010
Tweaking the American Dream
America Needs To Begin Dreaming Again – The American Dream and How To Restore it
In every recession or economic downturn, naturally, negativity prevails and our worries overcome our goals. The pressures of “right now” surpass the desires of our “dreams”. I, for one, am exhausted from the daily news reports about the current economic situation, the stock market, the stimulus, and worst of all – joblessness, as in this country we often define ourselves by our jobs. To believe that the American dream has become unreachable has become a logical, somewhat rational conclusion.
However, it is not true. We are a country that fought the bloodiest civil war in history, broke down the system of slavery and decades later elected the first black president, fought for the right to vote for all, and landed on the moon, among many other accomplishments. Life is circular, as are all of our situations; be it economically or even emotionally. I wanted to cite some possible ways of restoring the American Dream which seems so far deferred.
First and foremost, I want to credit the brilliant writer, Newsweek’s Fareed Zakaria, an American citizen from India, for bringing up this subject, and personalizing it. He writes, “The American dream for me, growing up in India in the 1970s, looked something like the opening credits of Dallas. The blockbuster TV series began with a kaleidoscope of big, brassy, sexy images — tracts of open land, shiny skyscrapers, fancy cars, cowboy businessmen and the very dreamy Victoria Principal. We watched bootlegged copies of the show, passed around on old Betamax cassettes. America (certainly the CBS soap-opera version of America) seemed dazzling and larger than life, especially set against the stagnant backdrop of India in the 1970s. Everyone I knew was fascinated by the U.S., whether they admitted it or not. Politicians who denounced the country by day would go home in the evenings and plot to send their kids to college in “the States.”
Of course, as the times progressed and we went to war, our heroes were assassinated, Watergate exposed a corrupt government, Zakaria understood that this American Dream is a little more complicated than meets the eye. But to his credit, not only did he never give up, he is one of the smartest, foremost writers and speakers in the media today. And so in his own way, he achieved that American Dream.
By now, you are familiar with the core issues as to why we are in the economic state of affairs we are in. What we ignore far too much is evolving globalization, and how, as Friedman cites, “The World if Flat”. In fact, the other day Tom Brokaw, an American patriot if I ever there was one, suggested that college graduates apply for jobs overseas!
While we are in fact a global world, America must grasp this, accept it, and figure out ways to excel in it; whether it is in education, trade, or foreign diplomacy, just to name a few key issues.
Let’s Dream Again
The first issue to tackle, and Zakaria makes this point as well, may be the toughest one. We need to downsize our lives. What is important to you? What happened to eating with the family at the dinner table? Now, it’s take-out or running to a restaurant for a quick, be it expensive, bite to eat.
We consume gas and buy luxury cars despite the damage this causes the environment, not to mention what it does to our global standing. It is time now, and I mean now, to make the cuts and edits in our lifestyles so that we can try to balance the deficit and the stimulus, to fix our personal and national budget, and get back on the rails to economic and spiritual recovery. Otherwise, the American Dream is nothing but that… a dream.
So, How? What Do We Do?
We invest in ourselves. Thomas Friedman and Fareed Zakaria have been arguing for years now that investing in start-ups (look at Facebook, Google, and Apple), is the way for us to grow. Let’s invest rather than consume. Let’s bet on ourselves. “Made in America” should not just be an economic goal, but it should be a stamp that represents true quality.
We need to invest in research and development in all fields. While this has to start by improving our education system, particularly in math and science, America – not China or India – should be discovering the drugs to eradicate diseases such as cancer.
This country should see itself as one big research lab where we not only come up with new medications, but new ways to live green, to get off of our addiction to foreign oil, and so many other ideas that American ingenuity has brought the world.
By investing in start-ups, we are investing in people. This is the key to getting back to “our America”.
The Government
If the Democrats and Republicans were my children, well, I would have to put them on a time-out. Enough campaigning and time to start legislating. Americans are losing faith in the very system we created – the democratic process that other countries admire. Let’s stop with the partisan politics and work to get things done.
Fareed Zakaria pointed out the following fact: “The term American Dream was coined during the Great Depression. The historian James Truslow Adams published The Epic of America in 1931, in an atmosphere of even greater despair than today’s. He wanted to call his book The American Dream, but his publishers objected. No one will pay $3.50 for a book about a “dream,” they said. Still, Adams used the phrase so often that it entered the lexicon. The American Dream, he said, was of “a better, richer and happier life for all our citizens of every rank, which is the greatest contribution we have made to the thought and welfare of the world. That dream or hope has been present from the start. Ever since we became an independent nation, each generation has seen an uprising of ordinary Americans to save the American Dream from the forces which appear to be overwhelming it.”
Well, I say we start dreaming again. We look at one another, we invest in one another, and we get the train running again. Complacency is the death of dreams, and too many people have become complacent. Help your friend find that job, or bail out a family member in danger of loosing their house.
Whatever you do, Fight Back! to keep the American Dream alive. [Fightback]
Words of Wisdom....."Realize we are all insignificant....And get your nose out of the air"
In every recession or economic downturn, naturally, negativity prevails and our worries overcome our goals. The pressures of “right now” surpass the desires of our “dreams”. I, for one, am exhausted from the daily news reports about the current economic situation, the stock market, the stimulus, and worst of all – joblessness, as in this country we often define ourselves by our jobs. To believe that the American dream has become unreachable has become a logical, somewhat rational conclusion.
However, it is not true. We are a country that fought the bloodiest civil war in history, broke down the system of slavery and decades later elected the first black president, fought for the right to vote for all, and landed on the moon, among many other accomplishments. Life is circular, as are all of our situations; be it economically or even emotionally. I wanted to cite some possible ways of restoring the American Dream which seems so far deferred.
First and foremost, I want to credit the brilliant writer, Newsweek’s Fareed Zakaria, an American citizen from India, for bringing up this subject, and personalizing it. He writes, “The American dream for me, growing up in India in the 1970s, looked something like the opening credits of Dallas. The blockbuster TV series began with a kaleidoscope of big, brassy, sexy images — tracts of open land, shiny skyscrapers, fancy cars, cowboy businessmen and the very dreamy Victoria Principal. We watched bootlegged copies of the show, passed around on old Betamax cassettes. America (certainly the CBS soap-opera version of America) seemed dazzling and larger than life, especially set against the stagnant backdrop of India in the 1970s. Everyone I knew was fascinated by the U.S., whether they admitted it or not. Politicians who denounced the country by day would go home in the evenings and plot to send their kids to college in “the States.”
Of course, as the times progressed and we went to war, our heroes were assassinated, Watergate exposed a corrupt government, Zakaria understood that this American Dream is a little more complicated than meets the eye. But to his credit, not only did he never give up, he is one of the smartest, foremost writers and speakers in the media today. And so in his own way, he achieved that American Dream.
By now, you are familiar with the core issues as to why we are in the economic state of affairs we are in. What we ignore far too much is evolving globalization, and how, as Friedman cites, “The World if Flat”. In fact, the other day Tom Brokaw, an American patriot if I ever there was one, suggested that college graduates apply for jobs overseas!
While we are in fact a global world, America must grasp this, accept it, and figure out ways to excel in it; whether it is in education, trade, or foreign diplomacy, just to name a few key issues.
Let’s Dream Again
The first issue to tackle, and Zakaria makes this point as well, may be the toughest one. We need to downsize our lives. What is important to you? What happened to eating with the family at the dinner table? Now, it’s take-out or running to a restaurant for a quick, be it expensive, bite to eat.
We consume gas and buy luxury cars despite the damage this causes the environment, not to mention what it does to our global standing. It is time now, and I mean now, to make the cuts and edits in our lifestyles so that we can try to balance the deficit and the stimulus, to fix our personal and national budget, and get back on the rails to economic and spiritual recovery. Otherwise, the American Dream is nothing but that… a dream.
So, How? What Do We Do?
We invest in ourselves. Thomas Friedman and Fareed Zakaria have been arguing for years now that investing in start-ups (look at Facebook, Google, and Apple), is the way for us to grow. Let’s invest rather than consume. Let’s bet on ourselves. “Made in America” should not just be an economic goal, but it should be a stamp that represents true quality.
We need to invest in research and development in all fields. While this has to start by improving our education system, particularly in math and science, America – not China or India – should be discovering the drugs to eradicate diseases such as cancer.
This country should see itself as one big research lab where we not only come up with new medications, but new ways to live green, to get off of our addiction to foreign oil, and so many other ideas that American ingenuity has brought the world.
By investing in start-ups, we are investing in people. This is the key to getting back to “our America”.
The Government
If the Democrats and Republicans were my children, well, I would have to put them on a time-out. Enough campaigning and time to start legislating. Americans are losing faith in the very system we created – the democratic process that other countries admire. Let’s stop with the partisan politics and work to get things done.
Fareed Zakaria pointed out the following fact: “The term American Dream was coined during the Great Depression. The historian James Truslow Adams published The Epic of America in 1931, in an atmosphere of even greater despair than today’s. He wanted to call his book The American Dream, but his publishers objected. No one will pay $3.50 for a book about a “dream,” they said. Still, Adams used the phrase so often that it entered the lexicon. The American Dream, he said, was of “a better, richer and happier life for all our citizens of every rank, which is the greatest contribution we have made to the thought and welfare of the world. That dream or hope has been present from the start. Ever since we became an independent nation, each generation has seen an uprising of ordinary Americans to save the American Dream from the forces which appear to be overwhelming it.”
Well, I say we start dreaming again. We look at one another, we invest in one another, and we get the train running again. Complacency is the death of dreams, and too many people have become complacent. Help your friend find that job, or bail out a family member in danger of loosing their house.
Whatever you do, Fight Back! to keep the American Dream alive. [Fightback]
Words of Wisdom....."Realize we are all insignificant....And get your nose out of the air"
Monday, 25 October 2010
Autumn calls you to its bosom...do not deny its call!
Suddenly theres an autumn chill in the air and golden brown everywhere! I do love the changing seasons and autumn being one of my favorites. That first step out the door at 6am to greet an orangey sunrise illuminating a pale blue sky..no artist could make it more perfect. That sharp cold chill on your nose and steamy breath making you feel so alive. A smell of damp rotting vegitation and a smouldering bonfire from the night before stimulating your senses. Fallen leaves scatter beneath your feet marking your presence and hopping rabbits in the distance scouring for food along the sheltered hedge rows. Large black crows and larks tune up for the morning chorus that announces another new day with its own unique soundtrack. The whole landscape tones down and changes to a melancholy mood and strangely this effects us too...Its as if we batton down the hatches for the next 4 months and watch tv!
Dont crawl under a stone this winter force yourself out the door to experience this changing theatre of nature with its change of scenery in colors sounds smells and moods. Theres a strange enchanting beauty in its melancholy with trees stripped bare exposing their powerful wrinkly skinned limbs and a carpet of rich brown golden leaves crunching beneath your feet in the morning frost. The barren brown ploughed fields that gave up their rich harvest just a few months before and now lay bare to the elements. That seething chill in the air that penetrates to your very soul and makes the nerve endings on your skin feel so alert.
Suddenly along the hedge rows you stumble across a flash of color in this moody landscape..its a Holly bush with a flash of blood red and still green foliage like a rebel in the rough refusing to give into natures Autumn ravages...defiant in bold bright color. Suddenly theres a stirring amongst the trees and the Larks flee screaming from the tall trees warning of danger...your adrenaline causes you to stiffen! Probably one of natures shyest creatures are slowly creeping through the undergrowth ie a herd of Deer. Their watery fearful eyes darting in every direction as they tread forward in unknown ground. Smooth brightly colored fine fur coats that fashion houses envy glisten in the early morning sun. They pass by quietly with their young hugging their tails and you are reminded we share this Earth with beautiful creatures.
As we head for home on this brisk early morning walk we feel surprisingly exhausted but exhilarated inside. Our nose is runny and feet cold but they dont distract from a warm feeling inside. Hard to explain but its a feeling similar to when something suddenly inspires your thoughts out of the blue. Modern life shields us from our natural rhythms that are meant to be in tune with the nature around us. We cut ourselves off in cushioned environments with artificial heat and light that stifle our natural instincts. We are an animal and need to connect with our natural environment to know who we are. Do not hide away this Autumn/winter...get out there you will feel better for it! CALLEN
Words of Wisdom..... "Cut your own path....Only dead fish swim with the tide"
Dont crawl under a stone this winter force yourself out the door to experience this changing theatre of nature with its change of scenery in colors sounds smells and moods. Theres a strange enchanting beauty in its melancholy with trees stripped bare exposing their powerful wrinkly skinned limbs and a carpet of rich brown golden leaves crunching beneath your feet in the morning frost. The barren brown ploughed fields that gave up their rich harvest just a few months before and now lay bare to the elements. That seething chill in the air that penetrates to your very soul and makes the nerve endings on your skin feel so alert.
Suddenly along the hedge rows you stumble across a flash of color in this moody landscape..its a Holly bush with a flash of blood red and still green foliage like a rebel in the rough refusing to give into natures Autumn ravages...defiant in bold bright color. Suddenly theres a stirring amongst the trees and the Larks flee screaming from the tall trees warning of danger...your adrenaline causes you to stiffen! Probably one of natures shyest creatures are slowly creeping through the undergrowth ie a herd of Deer. Their watery fearful eyes darting in every direction as they tread forward in unknown ground. Smooth brightly colored fine fur coats that fashion houses envy glisten in the early morning sun. They pass by quietly with their young hugging their tails and you are reminded we share this Earth with beautiful creatures.
As we head for home on this brisk early morning walk we feel surprisingly exhausted but exhilarated inside. Our nose is runny and feet cold but they dont distract from a warm feeling inside. Hard to explain but its a feeling similar to when something suddenly inspires your thoughts out of the blue. Modern life shields us from our natural rhythms that are meant to be in tune with the nature around us. We cut ourselves off in cushioned environments with artificial heat and light that stifle our natural instincts. We are an animal and need to connect with our natural environment to know who we are. Do not hide away this Autumn/winter...get out there you will feel better for it! CALLEN
Words of Wisdom..... "Cut your own path....Only dead fish swim with the tide"
Wednesday, 13 October 2010
The price of Liberation + Freedom $7.500
It was just another every day event in downtown Afghanistan in 2010. Our brave Coalition forces were doing their brave duty for their country and helping to keep the free world free although I'm not quite sure what that means anymore? I sat in the comfort of my UK living room on a lazy Autumn afternoon watching my TV as events unfolded on just another day in some back water dusty village in Afghanistan. Some TV camera crew were following a Platoon of American Marines on their latest mission. Apparently some Afghan farmer familiar with the American routine of paying Yankee Dollars for any information regarding the Taliban told a local patrol that he saw the Taliban resting in a nearby village so....B-Platoon who were exhausted after a recent mission where they had lost a friend to an IED [improvised Explosive Device] were ordered to move in and investigate. There were the usual moans about not having enough rest time....that they'd only just got back from the previous mission..had lost a comrade etc all ignored by their commander who told them to get off their asses and make some kills as theres bad guys in that village yonder.
It was a blistering hot afternoon and the mood amongst the Platoon was sombre as they slowly paced forward across the dusty field at the north of the village. They knew the drill after countless other missions in this never ending game of cat + mouse with the enemy. Trouble was they can never distinguish the Taliban from the innocent locals because they all wore the same Tribal garb of flowing sack like gowns and cloth head dress. The guys in the Platoon all called them Ragheads and had little respect for their traditions. All they could think of was witnessing the bloody human remains of fellow Marines blown up by IED's over the past 6 months of tour duty. it made the most compassionate of men hardened and insensitive to human suffering. such ugly unthinkable scenes caused a trauma and weariness in war torn men and they knew it paid to be ready for immediate action..oh yes they were trigger happy because it kept you alive in this place.
They crept up to the perimeter of the village and ahead of them were a small group of children playing which was the norm. a few Afghan men having noticed the approaching soldiers scurried away in fear although this could so easily be mis-interpreted as suspicious to the untrained eye. a while later others rushed inside buildings slamming the door and covering windows. There was only one thing in the Marines minds as they broke cover and rushed forward in a group shouting out orders with guns at the ready and that is the report says there are Taliban here! Doors were kicked in and amongst the sudden chaos a few stun grenades were thrown into dwellings causing screams and shouts amongst the terrified locals. Shots were fired and no one really knew if it was from your fellow Marines or the enemy....tension..fear..mayhem..all the ingredients of this situation. It was almost a normal reaction that one Marine heard firing and thought it was coming from a nearby dwelling so fired a propelled grenade from his assault rifle through the window. A huge bang and it was all suddenly quiet.
Fifteen minutes later and it was alover. All buildings were declared cleared and safe. the locals had been rounded up in the centre of the compound and were being interrogated. some were sitting on the ground placid with their hands tied by plastic ties while mothers were crying and children shaking in fear. A few Afghan men were shouting in agitated tones and waving their arms around but as far as the Marines were concerned it was a successful mission with no casualties taken. The village elders managed to speak in broken English that they had been mistaken..that there were no Talban here at all..that they had mistakenly killed innocent people.
Then it all came to light...The two buildings where grenades had been fired into one of them contained a mother and her two children..they had been frightened and were afraid to come out of the building. The distraught father of that family was lead forward by an Elder and could barely stand up in his sobbing grief. The Marine Lieutenant was shown inside one of the buildings to find the scattered bloody bodies of two small children..one a little girl of around 10 in her ragged dress and a boy of 5 or so..in the corner lay the mother with her stomach ripped open and flies were already feasting on her warm blood in that damning heat. The Lieutenant barely showed any emotion as he scanned the scene...he'd seen it all before so many times and it was a consequence of war.
He ordered the medic to give the father some sedative to calm him down. through the village elder he tried to console him and explain as best he could that sadly mistakes happen in this war environment and his men were there to protect them and not harm them. The father looked up with a cold expression and dead eyes filled with tears...it was his wife..his son..his daughter. His life was destroyed in an instant and why?
It is standard procedure with the Marines that if such incidents occur then the commander of any Platoon are authorized to pay instant compensation to any innocent surviving victims of comflict and they carry an amount of money for this very purpose. The standard amount per life is $2,500 each....so the Marine private carefully counted out $7,500 and handed it to the almost lifeless father while explaining through the village elder that this was monetary compensation in order to help him get over his loss. shorty after this the Company departed from the village and headed back to base for some much needed rest time..they were relieved they had survived another day in this hot hell hole and upheld the flag of Freedom for these backward people. CALLEN
Words of Wisdom......"Great minds have always encountered violent opposition from.....mediocre minds"
It was a blistering hot afternoon and the mood amongst the Platoon was sombre as they slowly paced forward across the dusty field at the north of the village. They knew the drill after countless other missions in this never ending game of cat + mouse with the enemy. Trouble was they can never distinguish the Taliban from the innocent locals because they all wore the same Tribal garb of flowing sack like gowns and cloth head dress. The guys in the Platoon all called them Ragheads and had little respect for their traditions. All they could think of was witnessing the bloody human remains of fellow Marines blown up by IED's over the past 6 months of tour duty. it made the most compassionate of men hardened and insensitive to human suffering. such ugly unthinkable scenes caused a trauma and weariness in war torn men and they knew it paid to be ready for immediate action..oh yes they were trigger happy because it kept you alive in this place.
They crept up to the perimeter of the village and ahead of them were a small group of children playing which was the norm. a few Afghan men having noticed the approaching soldiers scurried away in fear although this could so easily be mis-interpreted as suspicious to the untrained eye. a while later others rushed inside buildings slamming the door and covering windows. There was only one thing in the Marines minds as they broke cover and rushed forward in a group shouting out orders with guns at the ready and that is the report says there are Taliban here! Doors were kicked in and amongst the sudden chaos a few stun grenades were thrown into dwellings causing screams and shouts amongst the terrified locals. Shots were fired and no one really knew if it was from your fellow Marines or the enemy....tension..fear..mayhem..all the ingredients of this situation. It was almost a normal reaction that one Marine heard firing and thought it was coming from a nearby dwelling so fired a propelled grenade from his assault rifle through the window. A huge bang and it was all suddenly quiet.
Fifteen minutes later and it was alover. All buildings were declared cleared and safe. the locals had been rounded up in the centre of the compound and were being interrogated. some were sitting on the ground placid with their hands tied by plastic ties while mothers were crying and children shaking in fear. A few Afghan men were shouting in agitated tones and waving their arms around but as far as the Marines were concerned it was a successful mission with no casualties taken. The village elders managed to speak in broken English that they had been mistaken..that there were no Talban here at all..that they had mistakenly killed innocent people.
Then it all came to light...The two buildings where grenades had been fired into one of them contained a mother and her two children..they had been frightened and were afraid to come out of the building. The distraught father of that family was lead forward by an Elder and could barely stand up in his sobbing grief. The Marine Lieutenant was shown inside one of the buildings to find the scattered bloody bodies of two small children..one a little girl of around 10 in her ragged dress and a boy of 5 or so..in the corner lay the mother with her stomach ripped open and flies were already feasting on her warm blood in that damning heat. The Lieutenant barely showed any emotion as he scanned the scene...he'd seen it all before so many times and it was a consequence of war.
He ordered the medic to give the father some sedative to calm him down. through the village elder he tried to console him and explain as best he could that sadly mistakes happen in this war environment and his men were there to protect them and not harm them. The father looked up with a cold expression and dead eyes filled with tears...it was his wife..his son..his daughter. His life was destroyed in an instant and why?
It is standard procedure with the Marines that if such incidents occur then the commander of any Platoon are authorized to pay instant compensation to any innocent surviving victims of comflict and they carry an amount of money for this very purpose. The standard amount per life is $2,500 each....so the Marine private carefully counted out $7,500 and handed it to the almost lifeless father while explaining through the village elder that this was monetary compensation in order to help him get over his loss. shorty after this the Company departed from the village and headed back to base for some much needed rest time..they were relieved they had survived another day in this hot hell hole and upheld the flag of Freedom for these backward people. CALLEN
Words of Wisdom......"Great minds have always encountered violent opposition from.....mediocre minds"
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